Minion: 100 Ways of Ridding of Boredom
by TechnoDee
Summary: King Dedede's minions are basically your common enemies in every Kirby game. They simply get in Kirby's way and attempt to stop him. But what do they do when Kirby isn't invading King Dedede's Castle? Rated T for language.
1. The Game

_'Kay. So my second story._

_For this story, there's going to be a chapter every day. Unless something really bad crops up. Like, **REALLY BAD**. Like I'm banned, or have tests, those kind of things. And so we have a chapter every day, but just a short bit._

_So this story is basically what happens to a Dedede minion while not defending the castle._

_Please review. You don't like it, just exit, 'kay? 'Kay? Great._

_Enjoy._

* * *

1: The Game

_A form of play or sport._

* * *

When you come to Castle Dedede, you get interviewed, you get accepted, you are deemed as a minion.

And as a minion, you are deemed as a pawn.

This is a game.

You come to Castle Dedede, you get interviewed, you get accepted, deemed a minion, also deemed as a pawn. This is known as The Cycle.

In this game, there are pawns. The ones who do the bidding of stronger, more powerful ones. These stronger, more powerful ones are the leaders. They fight for dominance. For the quest of world domination.

Pawns help the leaders. They do their bidding, no matter how unreasonable it is.

Once the pawn is useless, the pawn is gotten rid of.

"Useless" means when the enemy has defeated them, which is when the pawn has no more health and cannot do anything anymore. The leader does not care for the pawn. He will mercilessly destroy it and snatch it out of existence.

They have gone through The Cycle. They are pawns. They get in their enemy's way, but they never win.

Yet they never become useless. They are never fully destroyed. Their enemy is a benevolent enemy. He does not destroy anything fully, unless he has to. They always come out alive. Injured, but alive.

Pawns get healed overtime, so long as they don't get injured again.

These pawns, that have survived through The Cycle, and are still playing in The Game.

Their ruler is none other than King Dedede.

And they are none other than Waddle Doo and Bandana Dee.


	2. The Hunt

_Okay, got one not-really-that-pleasant review..._

**_MelKnight_**_: Does it? I swear to God I have never read it, I didn't copy it! I got it from some philosophical talk that my sister had...  
_

_Okay. So. Second day, second chapter. It's early morning for me here. Please review, don't flame._

_...Come to think of it, why do authors still flame even when they know how much flames hurt? (And the people who aren't authors just don't bother to take off their shoes, it seems.)_

* * *

2: The Hunt

_An act of hunting wild animals or game._

* * *

Somewhere in Castle Dedede, underground, was the Minion Hallways. It was called that because while it was underground, there weren't much rooms, and only hallways. In Room 16, Corridor 223, Bandana Dee slept, still having his bandana on, since he always did. (It's like Meta Knight and his mask. Capiche?) Each room had four bunk beds, each at the corner of the room.

If you're lucky, you get sleep until eight in the morning before you're forced to be woken up. If you're just ordinary, you'll be woken up at six to start duty. If you're unlucky, you'd be woken up at four in the morning to hunt for the meals for the day.

Bandana Dee was shaken awake by Waddle Doo. Bandana Dee groaned and flicked open an eye at the cyclops. Waddle Doo was wearing amber earmuffs and the brown cloak all minions received when they were accepted into Castle Dedede.

"Mmrgh," Bandana Dee mumbled, a very dignified response considering his level of consciousness.

"Bandana Dee, wake up! Look at this." Waddle Doo shoved a piece of paper in Bandana Dee's face.

_You, **#2768**, and **#2769** are required to go out and hunt for **six pigs**. Bring them back dead. Please inform your partner(s) about this. Failure to do so will end up having you in the prison. Have a good day._

#2768 was Waddle Doo.

#2769 was...Bandana Dee.

"We need to start hunting by five, you know!"

"Is it for dinner?"

"Yeah."

"Pork stew?"

"Yeah."

"So early?"

"Yeah."

"And the pork stew is only for Your Fatness?"

"Yeah."

Bandana Dee groaned again and adjusted his bandana before grabbing his brown cloak hanging on the cloak rack. Not even bothering to at least splash himself with water, the waddle dee grabbed his spear and nodded. "Ready."

Waddle Doo narrowed his eye. "Not even bothering to shower, Bandana Dee?"

"Just Bandana'll do, ta." The waddle dee sauntered out of the Minion Hallways, followed by a rather disgusted Waddle Doo.

If you're wondering why they have earmuffs and cloaks, it's because it's snowing outside.

"I pity the guards on duty," Bandana Dee said sympathetically, nodding at the shivering waddle dees. "Why haven't they taken their own cloaks?"

"Our wonderful king said _no cloaks when on duty_, it gets in the way of your job! So actually, we shouldn't be wearing out cloaks."

"Heck if I care."

It was pretty easy, if you've been doing this sort of thing for the past few years. All they had to do was to waddle up to a pig cave, kill six pigs, flee from the cave, call off the guards on duty (you _could_ do that) then make the remaining pigs assault Dedede.

"So bloody."

"Uh-huh."

"I got blood stains on my bandana. Gotta go take it to the laundromat later."

And then _it_ started— "_Intruder alert! Intruder al__ert! All troops are required to defend the castle at all costs._"

Waddle Doo's eye twitched. "Oh, it's the king and his useless taunting dares to Kirby. Kirby always takes up the challenge, you know."

Bandana Dee stared, sighing as he remembered the time when Kirby inhaled him temporarily and deposited him in the rubbish chute. It was _such_ a ride down. Luckily, the rubbish chute's path was spiral-ish, so although he went fast, he didn't die. Just a lot of screaming.

"I hope he doesn't digest me. I ended up in The Place until Kirby got rid of his Beam Ability."

The creatures who got inhaled were sent to a place, where it was completely black and you could only see yourself. They started calling it The Place. They could only come out when Kirby got rid of his ability. If you're a thing that doesn't give any ability, like waddle dee, you'd just end up back in your room.

Bandana Dee sighed. "Oh well. Let's go."


	3. The Meal

_I couldn't update yesterday because I was too busy. Sorry!_

* * *

3: The Meal

_Any of the regular occasions in a day when a reasonably large amount of food is eaten._

* * *

After hunting down the pigs, and delivering it to the kitchen, and defending the castle from Kirby and losing—again—, Bandana Dee and Waddle Doo headed down to Comfortable Cabin _(A/n: I wanted to call it Cozy Cabin... But you know, that would be complete Kirby's Epic Yarn.)_.

"It's so cold these days... Perfect for figure skating," Waddle Doo mused.

"But you don't skate," Bandana Dee pointed out.

"True," Waddle Doo grumpily agreed.

They were recovering from their injuries from fighting Kirby. Bandana Dee sipped on his cup of tea. Waddle Doo had temporarily gone to The Place. Kirby had beaten a lot of enemies with the Beam Ability, sadly.

"I was thinking that we might have to hide next time Kirby appears," Waddle Doo sighed. "He gives me too much injuries. What is my mother going to say when she finds out about it?"

"Your _mother_," Bandana Dee began, "could not care less for you. This is _exactly_ the reason why she sent you to this no-salary place which only allows you to go back to your homes for five hours before returning a year."

"You're so cruel, Bandana Dee."

"I know, right."

They eventually walked over to the kitchen and helped to prepare the pork stew. Lunch was over long ago, and it was nearly time for dinner. In fact, it was already six-thirty. The grumpy king liked to have his dinner at seven.

Waddle Doo yawned tiredly. "This is so morbid. Chopping up pigs and looking at their blood stain the knives and sometimes your hands. Next time, I think I'll just go chop the carrots or something."

"But everyone wants to do that, which is why that job is done so fast. And the king doesn't like a lot of carrots. He's a meaty person."

"Then I might as well just cut the celery. It's about the same."

"And everyone wants to do that as well, and it's finished super fast. And the king also hates celery like eating carrots. He's a meaty person."

"Why is the king so picky?" Waddle Doo groaned.

"Also, he likes 50% meat, 49.5% of gravy, and 0.5% of others," Bandana Dee continued.

"Ya know what?" Waddle Doo said as he washed the knife. "Great King should just make the meal himself."


	4. The Rubbish Chute

_Fourth chapter. Yay._

* * *

4: The Rubbish Chute

_A smooth, open shaft in a multistory building, used to convey trash from upper floors to a collection room._

* * *

Just when King Dedede finished his pork stew, Kirby was attacking again. The king was curious about this.

"You actually had the balls to bully Gooey," Kirby yelled. "I won't let you get away with this."

The same alarm went off. Bandana Dee and Waddle knew they had to escape—lest they become _seriously_ injured again. Kirby seemed to be running through the levels, and was murdering anything that seemed to block him. Most of the cavalry hid—a few brave ones stepped out, thinking they were strong enough. Well, strong enough for Kirby to deem "bosses", but Kirby beat them anyway.

Bandana Dee panicked. He knew that he had to be loyal to his Great King. But at the same time, he needed a reason to escape. If he had a reason, the Great King couldn't yell at him.

"Waddle Doo," Bandana Dee called. Waddle Doo frantically dashed over.

"Kirby! He's two floors from us! We've got to hurry, Bandana, please!"

Bandana Dee scanned the area. Just then, he remembered the time when Kirby defeated him. He was deposited down the rubbish chute, which was spiral, so he didn't die. He beckoned Waddle Doo over.

"We have to go down the rubbish chute, Waddle Doo. Kirby won't go back down until he's defeated the Great King, and then Kirby flies away. If we go _down_, he'll never encounter us."

"But—"

"Waddle Doo, he's coming up the stairs! Hurry up!"

Bandana Dee shoved Waddle Doo in, and when he turned around, Kirby was standing there, about to inhale him. "Proceed, please!" Bandana Dee yelled as he himself dived into the rubbish chute.

Waddle Doo was screaming. Bandana Dee was not, as it was his second time going down. Bandana Dee was sitting down, nervously looking back. Was Kirby after them? Did Kirby want to kill Dedede's minions because of whatever the Great King had done to his friend Gooey?

Bandana Dee gripped on to the side of the rubbish chute, praying and hoping that no one would send rubbish down just yet,

"We're _landing_!" Waddle Doo screamed.

Bandana Dee braced himself.

They both landed in a junkyard room, landing _hard_ on their bottoms. "Ouch!" they both yelped. Waddle Doo narrowed his eye. "We've got to find a way out of this junkyard room."

"Easy, that way," Bandana Dee said, pulling Waddle Doo towards the entrance.

When they arrived out, Waddle Doo gasped and saw that they were on the very first floor. Kirby, by now, was on the sixth floor, about to proceed to the seventh. Waddle Doo sighed a sigh of relief, before turning to Bandana Dee seriously.

"What reason are we going to tell the Great King, Bandana Dee?"

Bandana Dee smiled. He knew what he was going to do.

"We were just cleaning out the garbage, O Great King!"


	5. The Wall

_Okay, sorry, I couldn't update yesterday and the day before because my sister's friend came over for a sleepover and they completely just HOGGED THE LAPTOP so I had no other way of updating._

_**MelKnight**: I didn't say I thought you were trying to flame. I merely thought that you meant that...  
You know what? This is just complicated. Just forget about it. ERASE IT FROM YOUR MEMORY. NOW. IT NEVER HAPPENED.  
_

_**Clove31**: That's just Bandana Dee's theory. It's partly true, of course._

* * *

5: The Wall

_A continuous vertical brick or stone structure that encloses and divides an area of land._

* * *

"_Intruder alert! Intruder alert! All troops are required to defend the castle at all costs._"

"It's not Kirby," Bandana Dee whispered.

Waddle Doo, faced stuff with roasted chicken in his invisible mouth, choked and spluttered, "What do you mean, it's not Kirby?!"

Bandana Dee nodded, turning on the cameras. "Because the intruder broke in. Kirby usually just waltzes in straight or comes in from his Warp Star. If he walked in straight, he wouldn't have caused so much destruction on _the second level_. If he used his Warp Star, we would have seen him coming. And besides, if he uses his Warp Star, it usually comes in on the fourth floor. And most of all, this guy is _definitely_ not Kirby."

Waddle Doo peeked over. It was a circular thing with purple feet, a mask, yellow eyes, a cape, and a funny-looking golden sword.

All in all? Definitely 100% _not_ Kirby.

"Oh dear, he's strong," Waddle Doo whispered. "All the waddle dees have taken refuge, and, he's beaten Bonkers. He beat him in about six seconds. We won't last, and he's proceeding _quickly_."

"We can't go down the rubbish chute," Bandana Dee sighed. "Great King locked it, because it's still early in the morning. He usually unlocks it immediately after his lunch, which is when all the rubbish is thrown."

"We're in trouble," Waddle Doo said. "We're on the sixth floor. He's already on the third, Bandana. What else shall we do?"

Waddle Doo was the stronger one, while Bandana Dee had the brain. The waddle dee took a quick glance around the camera room, which they were in if you haven't caught on already, and nodded. "Even the camera room has an escape area. And besides, I'm pretty sure that's where the rest of the cavalry has hidden."

Bandana Dee ran towards the wall and knocked on it gently. It made a hollow sound. "Great. It's still here. What level is the intruder on?"

"The fourth," Waddle Doo replied.

"Okay, then we need to hurry. It's likely that he won't come into the camera room, but we still need to escape. First of all. Waddle Doo, come over."

Waddle Doo walked over. Bandana Dee had his back to the wall. "Okay, good. Now, stand beside me."

The cyclops did as told.

"And now _push_."

Waddle Doo took one second to realize what he needed to do. By then, Bandana Dee was already pushing. The next second, Waddle Doo pushed. The wall rotated with them, to a long, light pink hallway.

Why is was pink, Bandana Dee also did not know.

"This is an emergency route to the Minion Hallways," Bandana Dee told Waddle Doo. "I'm pretty sure the intruder has not invaded that. He came into the second floor of the castle. And the Minion Hallways is underground, you know."

"You're such a genius."

"I know. Just keep walking and we'll come across a door eventually. It will lead us to Corridor 362."

"We'll have to take the Transporter to Corridor 223."

"Yeah. Or, we could have a cup of tea at the cafe in Corridor 362. I heard the tea there is pretty good, too."

The Transporter, by the way, is a white platform that can hold up to a hundred waddle dees (waddle doos are the same size as them, I hope you know). It acted like an elevator, except there was a small screen and a bar of number buttons to push to the corridor where you wanted to go to. It's quite fast, and has railings at the sides, and one whole side opens when it comes to a stop. It's _really_ fast, correction, since it stops at almost every corridor.

Waddle Doo yawned slightly. "I'm getting a bit tired. I can definitely go have some rest."

"Yeah. Let's stop by the cafe in Corridor 362 first."

They eventually got to the door and opened it, and ended up in the bustling Corridor 362. By the way, there are a total of 1000 corridors, 100 rooms in each corridor, and 50 Transporters in total. Yeah, they had that many minions, if you included bosses (which occupied more than one room. They had to join some rooms together) and the common enemies, then you would know. Go have a look at the list of enemies you can find in Castle Dedede on Kirby Wiki, and multiply the number by I don't know, and you don't know too, right? (Yeah, that's because I gave you the number I don't know.)

"You know, Great King is going to give us a yell again someday, for not protecting his castle," Waddle Doo said as they sat down on a chair at the cafe, also known as Cafe 362.

"Well, if he got rid of all of us, what is he going to do?" Bandana Dee asked slyly, and called a waiter over for their order.


	6. The Video

_NEXT CHAPTER. WHICH I OWE YOU READERS._

_**Guest** (reviewed Chapter 3): Sorry I didn't reply in the last one, I only just got it. Yeah, I should have, but there is a REASON, which will be explained VERY SOON in this chapter._

* * *

6: The Video

_The system of recording, reproducing, or broadcasting visual images on or from videotape._

* * *

A rocky, called Rockiest (for being the most sturdy rocky in the whole Castle Dedede), came running back. Apparently, he had videotaped the whole fight with the intruder and King Dedede. Rockiest was sent because if he was accidentally caught in the fight, he had the highest chance of escaping. A boss would be too obvious, of course.

The intruder, identified as Meta Knight, had won the battle.

Meta Knight had beat the last mini boss of Castle Dedede, and was heading towards the big door that led to the arena. A messenger waddle dee had informed Dedede about this. Dedede panicked, and picked up his trusty hammer, and decided to face Meta Knight.

(Italics is the video.)

_Meta Knight was walking up the steps, having just defeated the last mini boss. Blood stained his golden sword._

"That sword, it's Galaxia!" a chilly exclaimed. "It's a legendary sword."

Bandana Dee glanced at it, and shivered at the blood. Meta Knight was not as benevolent as Kirby, was he?

_"I am reaching the arena soon," Meta Knight murmured, "and I shall beat this king and earn the title for myself."_

"He earned the title of _king_?!" Waddle Doo couldn't help but gasp loudly.

"No, we managed to catch him off-guard with Kabula. We managed to do it before he took the king's item that represented the king, the robe," Rockiest explained patiently. "We threw him out of the castle. But we must be careful next time."

_If,_ Bandana Dee thought, _beating the king earns you the title of king, then...isn't Kirby king already?_ Kirby as a king...Bandana Dee would not mind having such a benevolent ruler.

_Meta Knight entered the room that contained the arena.  
_

All of them gasped loudly, bracing themselves for the fight.

_All there was was darkness. A yellow foot was seen in the corner._

Rockiest's foot.

_"Come out, you chicken of a king," Meta Knight taunted, finding his way up the steps of the arena. "I am not Kirby. I am not here to accept a challenge. I have come to claim the king's robe, which is rightfully mine, since I am the strongest of all creatures."_

_There was a small thump. Dedede was seen coming on the arena groggily as the whole arena lit up._

_"Ha, you must be even weaker than that Kirby fellow. 'Cause I'll finish you off," Dedede sneered as he readied his hammer.  
_

"The...king...never uses short forms of words," Waddle Doo said uncertainly. Like "comfy", that was an example (hence, it was called Comfortable Cabin. NOT Comfy Cabin). "So _why_ is he using it now?"

"Because dear Great King is a hypocrite," Bandana Dee sighed.

_A sharp squeal could be heard. It was Rockiest, but neither of them paid any attention. Dedede swung his hammer at Meta Knight, who expertly dodged it. Rockiest walked in front, making the fight appear larger._

_After a long while, of shaking, screaming and fighting, Dedede was fatigued, and in a last-ditch attempt, he threw his hammer at the completely-energetic Meta Knight. Of course, Meta Knight dodged it. Dedede panted, seeing his hammer fall at the end of the arena._

_"Meet your end," Meta Knight harshly said as he stepped forward, pointing Galaxia at Dedede._

_"Kabula!" Rockiest shrieked._

_A ginormous missile was shot at Meta Knight, catching him off-guard, and sent him flying out of the arena._

There was nothing more to the video.

"Now I see why Great King always loses to Kirby," Rockiest sighed. The minions agreed before doing their daily work.


	7. The Lesson

_Oh, just a short notice, if I ever get the chapter numbers mixed up (like it's supposed to be chapter seven but I put six or something like that) please tell me, okay? Thanks._

* * *

7: The Lesson

_Noun: An amount of teaching given at one time; a period of learning._

_Verb: Instruct or teach._

* * *

"Nooo! I don't wanna! It's scary down there!"

"Sure it is! But how are we going to do it if we don't try?"

"But what happens if we _can't_? This sounds too hard. _Gather up energy in your feet and jump! It's that easy._ Ohh no, doesn't sound so easy to me, it doesn't!"

"Come on, Waddle Doo, don't be a chicken. This is called jump-float, right? There's a trampoline down there, if it helps you."

Bandana Dee's soothing words did nothing to help Waddle Doo. "Do you know how _hard_ that trampoline is? Sometimes, I just wish I was a useless birdon that has _wings_ and can already fly."

The waddle dee snorted. "Well, apparently, you're not, so just _suck it up_, and jump-float! It's easy. Or sounds easy."

They were in a tower where the minions were trying to learn the jump-float (like how Bandana Dee jumps in _Kirby's Return to Dream Land_ or how helpers jump in _Kirby Super Star/Ultra_). Waddle Doo was utterly terrified. This was understandable for a person who didn't know what to do, no safety ropes, and was going to jump down from the thirteenth story.

Bandana Dee also did not know what to do; but he wasn't as afraid as Waddle Doo.

"Then _you_ go first!" Waddle Doo said stubbornly.

"Fine! I will!"

Bandana Dee walked over to the edge. He gulped at the height—No! He had to be strong. He had to...

Waddle Doo narrowed his eye suspiciously when Bandana Dee made no movement. "So you really are just a dog who can only _bark_."

That was the trigger.

Bandana Dee hated being taunted. When he was, he took up the challenge, no matter how dare-devil the action seemed. Bracing himself for possible impact (or possible success), the waddle dee jumped.

Down, down, down he went. Past the thirteenth, twelfth, eleventh floors... By the tenth, he remembered what he was supposed to do. By the ninth, he worked out how he could possibly do it. By the eighth, he was gathering up energy—and the energy to _scream_ if needed—and by the seventh, he was practically _flying_.

Whenever Bandana Dee fell just a _bit_, he would bound up again. This was an instinctive action—since, of course, he was so _high_—and it didn't require much energy. He laughed in glee—and started to fall. Down to the sixth story. He jumped again, feet feeling as if it had collided with _real solid floors_, but it hadn't. It had jumped on air. And that seemed fun for him.

He kept bouncing around the tower—it didn't require much energy, just the _tiniest_—and he could probably go on for years jumping, seeing as how much energy it took. But since he was sort of new, he figured he should go back up to the thirteenth story to tell Waddle Doo about his success.

No need for that, apparently.

Waddle Doo was jumping right behind, even if he was stumbling slightly. The look on his face was _pure delight_.

"See?" Bandana Dee yelled, adjusting his bandana as he landed back on the tower, feet touching the solid marble floor once again. "Was it scary?"

Waddle Doo didn't reply, but Bandana Dee already knew the answer.


	8. The Interview

_Okay guys just a notice here, I've had a break from school for a long time but now it's kind of reopening, so my updates will not be constant. Some days I will miss the updates. Just be patient, okay? I have a very busy life. But I'll try to make time for writing._

_**coleypepwars3679**: OMG IT'S YOU. Anyway I like to play as Bandana Dee too and when I do it's just a complete **MAD KILLING SPREE**.  
And my sis always plays as Meta Knight. Dunno why.  
And my bro plays as first player, so there's not...much of a choice..._

_Please review, but don't flame._

* * *

8: The Interview

_A meeting of people face to face, esp. for consultation._

* * *

In the Minion Hallways, at five-thirty in the morning, Bandana Dee slept. He was a neat sleeper. He didn't mess up the bed. But that is just irrelevant.

And _again_, he was woken up by dearest Waddle Doo.

Instead of saying anything, Waddle Doo passed the drowsy Bandana Dee a note.

_You, **#2768**, and **#2769** are required to go to the interviewing room to interview recruits to get accepted into Castle Dedede. One of you will take the notes, and another will ask the questions. Please inform your partner(s) about this. Failure to do so will end up having you in prison. Have a good day._

"Agh, I'm up," Bandana Dee groaned. "Do I need to bring paper or anything?"

"No, the items will be provided there. I will be asking the questions and you will be taking down the notes. Got it?"

"Got it."

The two made their way slowly down to the interviewing room, which was basically a small room with a table and three chairs. And a few crates over there, which contained some items that couldn't fit in the storage room.

Waddle Doo pressed a button on the table, signaling for the next person to come over for the interview. All of the recruits were waiting in the waiting room.

The first recruit was a waddle dee wearing a white headband. He nervously took a seat. "Hello, I'm Haddle."

Waddle Doo looked through the sheets and super speed, and finally found Haddle's profile. "Ah, yes. Okay, Haddle, we're only going to ask you a few questions, so this will be done fast." Waddle Doo didn't waste anymore time. "First, why do you want to join this place, Castle Dedede, as a minion?"

"Well, I want to make the king happy and I want to make a lot of friends. I also believe that working in this place will help the society with more people to work with, like, others can have less jobs that I will have, so less stress for them," Haddle said, uncertain in his choice of words.

Bandana Dee wrote that down quickly, while Waddle Doo slowly asked the next question. "What makes you think you can join this place as a minion?"

Haddle blinked, before adjusting his headband carefully. "Well, I'm strong, and I don't get stressed very easily, and I can work a lot without getting tired."

"...Okay, that's all. You will receive your response at five o'clock today in the afternoon. Please just wait in the castle for now," Waddle Doo said, thinking that Haddle would most probably make it.

After a long three hours, they finally reached the last recruit. Most of the recruits were nice and pleasant, and the others were just really nervous or anxious. But they were still nice.

The last one that entered was a scarlet Bonkers. Bandana Dee inwardly yelped and had a feeling the chair would break under his weight. Thankfully, the scarlet Bonkers didn't even sit on the seat. "Yo!" he yelled. "I'm Rad Bonkers. Might as well just call me R. Bonkers. Anyway, I don't need the interview, yeah? I'm prime military material!"

Waddle Doo was shocked. Bandana Dee took his speech down. Calming himself, Waddle Doo nodded. "Yes, I can see that... But first, I need to ask you some questions. Why do you want to join this place, Castle Dedede, as a minion?"

"I'm not a minion. Boss material."

"...Okay... Next, what makes you think you can join this place as a mi—_boss_?" Waddle Doo corrected, voice somewhat dripping with venom.

"I'm mostly stronger than all of you weaklings here, and I could possibly be stronger than the king. Anyways, I'm done here. Give me my response _soon_," R. Bonkers said threateningly. Then, he stormed out of the room.

"We're done here," Waddle Doo announced. "Let's just drop of your notes and the _kind_ waddle dee's office. Let's go down to Cafe 232. I hear the cupcakes there are just _wonderful_."

Bandana Dee agreed before they left.


	9. The Boat

_Today is day nine. Wait, how can I not notice it's been a few more days than a week? Maybe two more days? Really? I'm so happy._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Chapter 6: It's basically just a...video...on what happened in Chapter 5. Like, what really happened.  
Chapter 7: No, Waddle Doo did not find it scary after he saw Bandana Dee. That sounds a lot simpler, doesn't it?  
Chapter 8: Because, Dedede is a lazy fat king. And these are just a few instances when they're doing it. They don't do it all the time._

_BTW the chapter title is a bit redundant. But don't bother about the chapter name. Just read and enjoy. Okay? Okay._

_Please review! It'd be nice to have a review. And a NICE one at that, 'kay?_

* * *

9: The Boat

_A small vessel propelled on water by oars, sails or an engine._

* * *

Bandana Dee stared, overawed, by the large ship that he was standing in front of. He never knew Great King had bought such a majestic ship! What was it for? It really was large, in any case, and Bandana Dee thought it look really...well, delightful? Something along those lines. He just hoped it wouldn't get destroyed.

Waddle Doo jabbed the waddle dee's side, causing him to squeak in surprise. "You know, Great King bought this ship yesterday. At night. When most of the minions were sleeping," Waddle Doo said in a hushed whisper, glaring dangerously at the boat.

Fixing his bandana, Bandana Dee raised a brow. "So what? Does it matter if he did? How else is he going to get the ship, then?"

"Not just that, it's a _secondhand ship_," Waddle Doo continued, eyeing the ship as if it was a patch of...well, dung. "Do you know what that means?"

"No."

"I sympathize. You'll be in for some big trouble now." Waddle Doo began mumbling some words. He brightened up when he saw a rather familiar face. "Oh! Haddle! Hi! Didn't know you made it!"

"Apparently I _did_," Haddle said. Now that he was not in an interview, he was a lot more lively and friendly, and even a little more playful, or that's what he looked like. "Anyway, let me introduce myself again anyway. I'm Haddle. I like to wear my headband. I go crazy without it. And, I keep my retractable knife in there. Which is why I can't lose my headband."

"It's like me and my bandana! Though I don't store my spear in there," Bandana Dee said cheerfully. "The name is Bandana Dee."

"My name is Waddle Doo," the spherical cyclops said. "Unlike you guys, I do not have a weapon. However, I _bestow_ Kirby the Beam Ability when I am inhaled, so I'm sure you know what that means."

"Yes," Haddle agreed, "you can use your own Beam powers." He smiled cheerily. "I was accepted yesterday, and I was meant to take over an ill-tempered fire lion's room. I only get one bed, like most of you, and I'm in Room 43, Corridor 225, as well as some other new recruits."

"That isn't far from our corridor," Bandana Dee stated. "We both stay in Room 16, Corridor 223. ...Or something like that. And, oh yeah, ill-tempered fire lion. I think that's Farlula. Really ill-tempered, stubborn, smug, and all that crud."

Waddle Doo suddenly jumped up. "Is Retarded Bonkers there? Recruited?"

Haddle tilted his head in confusion. "You mean Rad Bonkers? R. Bonkers?" Waddle Doo nodded. "Yes. I saw his named on the recruited board while I was looking for my own name. I know, he's a meanie and really smug. I don't like him either. His room is six corridors away from mine, if I read correctly."

"Yes, you did. R. Bonkers, Room 57, Corridor 231." Bandana Dee nodded. "I saw it while I was looking through some profiles and editing them if necessary. This guy over here"—Bandana dee pointed at Waddle Doo accusingly—"was with me and was _sleeping_."

Before Haddle could reply, Dedede suddenly jumped on top of the silver boat. Yes, it was silver. Pure, shining silver, with a Dedede sign on the sides of the boat, which were in pure, genuine gold. "Hey, you minions!" he yelled at the top of his lungs. "Firstly, this boat. I'm going to try beating Kirby on water. See if I can beat puny guy. Secondly! I am going to bring some _strong_ minions with me. By the way, we will be gone for _at least_ two weeks."

Some of them gasped in horror. Some were excited (those were the ones which were strong and smug). Bandana Dee, Waddle Doo and Haddle actually hoped they wouldn't be picked, since they knew Kirby could probably chop off Himalayas effortlessly.

After mentioning a few names, all of them what Kirby would deem mini-bosses, Dedede finally shouted, "This one has just been recruited yesterday, but his strength is strong. He has shown me. Rad Bonkers, also known as R. Bonkers! That is all, and for those minions who have not been picked, you're just a plain out weak weakling."

As Dedede left, Haddle snorted. "Who cares if I'm strong or not? I don't care if I'm a weakling. If _that_ was meant to be an insult, try harder, Great King Shithead Dedede."

Both Bandana Dee and Waddle Doo admired Haddle's maturity for a while, before they headed down to Cafe 232 for some nice cupcakes.


	10. The Book

_Alright, so I want to say something first. My updates will be REALLY inconsistent these days. But just shut up and relax and read. Then everyone will be happy. Yay._

_And—oh my gosh! It's been ten days already. Does time seriously fly? Because that sucks._

* * *

10: The Book

_A written or printed work consisting of pages glued or sewn together along one side and bound in covers._

* * *

For some strange reason, today, Bandana Dee was given the job of doing workbooks.

Waddle Doo and Haddle were right next to Bandana Dee, sewing on the pages of the books.

It was the first day of Dedede's trip to defeat Kirby. Apparently, the pink hero could not be bothered to go out to sea. Obviously, His Stupidity never thought of this, if Kirby refused and didn't battle on water. Or, if Kirby just felt bone lazy that day.

Bandana Dee rolled his eyes.

_Whatever. I don't have time for any of that nonsense._

Haddle and Waddle Doo finally finished sewing up a book. Haddle was now _reading a book_, and Waddle Doo was too. Bandana Dee tapped his pen on his forehead, desperate to finish his work.

_What is the meaning of life?_

Sighing, Bandana Dee wrote his answer down.

_It is the thing we are all living. Life means that we are living and we have an alive body and spirit, and it comes before death. Robots and other non-living thing, such as gadgets, do not have lives, as they do not reproduce._

Bandana Dee read the next question.

_Do all living things have a heart?_

What a _stupid_ question.

_No. For example, plants are living because they grow and respond to any change of their surroundings. It, however, does not necessarily mean that one must have a heart to be alive. Plants and fungi are alive things because they grow, reproduce, and respond to their surroundings. However, they do not have a heart._

Bandana Dee groaned. "I have still _so_ many questions."

"Are they asking you philosophy?" Haddle asked.

"I dunno, they just ask me random questions. Your Unsightliness just told me to answer _all_ questions." Bandana Dee thought hard for a moment. "Maybe it's because he himself doesn't know it."

_What is death__?_

_Death is the end of one's life._

_Is death a sad thing?_

_It depends._

After a multitude of questions, Bandana Dee finally reached the last one. He exhaled, excited to finish up his silly work, that shouldn't even _be_ his work. He was a fighter, he fought and defended the castle, not that he could fight that much. He was _not_ some student of sorts. Or politician.

_What part of Dedede is good, awesome, great, or just anything positive?_

After such a long ways, Bandana Dee thought he would be asked a question that required thinking—and required the deep understanding of life. Now, he was just plain out irate.

_Nothing at all is good about Dedede. He eats all the food for himself that his servants lovingly cooked for him, he expects his minions to defend the castle, and doesn't even give us training when he expects us to. He just thinks we have a lot of power and we don't need anything. Also, about his stupidity—he asks questions, then claims that he "knows" the answer, when he doesn't really. And when we do something wrong, if it's just a minor mistake, he will lash out at us as if there's no tomorrow. He expects us to be perfect, but no one is perfect._

Bandana Dee soon realized he used "us" instead of "them" or "his servant".

_Never mind. It's okay. That way, he'll get the full impact._


	11. The Pickle

_Oh my god. Eleven days. It's nearing two weeks._

_This chapter is...based off a little conversation me and another author have had. And inspired by the disturbing pickle jar at my kitchen table that I have to walk past every day. It's seriously disturbing._

_**coleypepwars3679**: *screams horrified* NO! IT'S THE MARK! *throws sheets of blankets over self**muffled* NOW I WILL NEVER SEE IT AGAIN! HA!_

_**Golden Guest**(guest): Thank you. (And the best part is, it's completely easy to keep track of. Just check every day. Unless I can't update, that is.)_

_Please review! No flamers, by the way._

* * *

11: The Pickle

_A small cucumber preserved in vinegar, brine, or a similar solution._

* * *

Bandana Dee adjusted his bandana and fingered his spear—which was on his back, by the way—and bravely put a hand on the door. He breathed.

This was it.

No more running away now.

With a delicate push, the door opened so that it was ajar. It was not enough for him to slip in stealthily. Not that he really needed to, since he was about to step into enemy territory.

He shakily put up the walky-talky to his invisible mouth. "I'm n-near the enemy territory now, Waddle Doo," he said solemnly. "Place empty...except for _it_. Over."

"_Are you serious?_" came Waddle Doo's voice over the walky-talky. "_You have to be brave, Bandana. You have to. Over._"

"But...it's so dangerous..." Bandana Dee muttered cautiously, tapping the door open just a little more. "And will the ammo really work? Over."

"_Of course it will. Just shoot it, Bandana Dee. It must be on its table._" With a slight pause, Waddle Doo spoke again uncertainly. "_Such a deformed creature that has somehow managed to get its way there...we must rid of it quickly.__ Over._"

"Yes," Bandana Dee said solemnly. "Over and out." He shoved the walky-talky back in his bandana. He fingered his ammunition—which was not his spear, by the way—and opened the door fully. Once he stepped in, he could almost feel as if the thing was staring right at him. It had no face, but it was there. On the table, it sat, staring at Bandana Dee.

There it was.

The enemy.

With a shrill shriek, Bandana Dee picked up his ammunition and threw it at the enemy. The enemy fell over, off the table, and its protective shield went _smash_. Now, it was weak and exposed. And all over the floor. Bandana Dee threw his ammunition again at the enemy, and finally, the enemy made no sound. It always made no sound, but Bandana Dee could tell, since there was no more smell, it was gone and all that it needed was cleaning up.

Shakily, Bandana Dee grabbed his walky-talky and clicked the button. "Waddle Doo, it's me. The enemy is gone. Over."

"_It is? That's great, Bandana Dee. I'm so proud of you.__ Over._"

"Y-Yeah. It was kinda scary, but now it's covered with the ammunition now, so it doesn't look as ominous...I don't think. Over."

"_Really? The sugar cubes ammunition worked? Oh, that's great, Bandana Dee. I'll send a few waddle dees to clean it up. Good job.__ Over._"

"Yes, of course the sugar cubes ammunition worked. Now, there is no more smell, and it is sprinkled with sugar. Over."

"_That's just...swell. Tell me about it later. Meet me in front of the recreation room. Over and out._"

Bandana Dee nodded proudly, shoving the walky-talky in his bandana once again. He cast a disparaging glance over the fallen pickles, then at its broken glass bottle, and then nodded, before leaving the kitchen._  
_


	12. The Report

_GUESS WHO'S BACK?_

_...No, not Michael Jackson. He's dead._

_**coleypepwars3679**: OH MY GO—*blows up into smithereens*_

_**MelKnight**: That's the point of the story. It's supposed to be rolly with an update everyday._

_Please review! And that includes you too, lurkers._

* * *

12: The Report

_Give a spoken or written account of something that one has observed, heard, done, or investigated._

* * *

It was a normal day for Bandana Dee, Waddle Doo and Haddle—normal as in, running around crazily and doing work, while scolding people if they should feel necessary. They were running all over the place, hoping that this Meta Knight would not invade while their oh-so-stupid king was gone. If he took the throne, which was in the room past the arena, then Meta Knight would be deemed "king".

When Bandana Dee finally managed to slump in the cozy chairs of Comfortable Cabin, and took a sip of his tea, Haddle burst through the doors, spotted Bandana Dee, and dragged him out of Comfortable Cabin.

"_NO_! STOP IT! I'M NOT DONE WITH MY TEA!" Bandana Dee screamed as he flailed. But Haddle had an iron grip—there was no escaping him.

Bandana Dee was finally taken to the Communication Room, the room where they kept intact with their sent out troops. Bandana Dee sat on the floor, whining about his tea when he suddenly realized the change of environment. His head shot up as Waddle Doo stood there, looking rather impatient.

Knowing he was needed, Bandana Dee slunk into one of the chairs and pressed the button to activate the communicator. The screen immediately revealed a very angered Great King.

"Send the healing troops out. _Immediately_," he yelled as he raised his fist.

"But Great King! We—"

"Kirby has appeared, as he's beating almost everyone I have, and it will be a matter of time before he lands on the ship and attacks me," Dedede told them impatiently, "and I won't lose with a group of healers by my side."

"But, you see, Great King, you—"

"Do you _want_ me to lose? I've been waiting for so long, and there is little strength left in _my_ warriors! Kirby is beating them all without any problem whatsoever, and the only warriors I have left is Farlula and Rad Bonkers."

The mention of "Rad Bonkers" caused Bandana Dee to twitch in anger slightly. "But Great King," he hissed, making sure that his _wonderful_ king had his attention.

Finally, Dedede huffed. "What—R. Bonkers, Farlula, you have to take that cursed pink lump together at the same time!—is it?" he said impatiently, while giving orders to his two remaining warriors.

"Great King, you see, the message I have been trying to relay to you for the _longest_ time now..."

"...is that all our healing troops are gone."

"_What_?" Dedede screeched, staring in disbelief at Bandana Dee.

"You _heard_ me. Our healing troops are gone. In fact, we never even _had_ any healing troops. It was a section that you said you would train. Healer Dees, isn't that right? And they have white wings? Well, we never had any. At all. You just said that some of us 'might be trained'. But you see, you've been training to many to be soldiers, none of us are healers. This is your problem, and your problem only."

"Then _do_ something! Send over soldiers, send in troops—"

"It seems that I will have to remind Great King that Healer Dees are the only army troop that can fly. Also, we have no boats, and you are in the middle of the sea. We have no ways of reaching you whatsoever." Bandana Dee felt sort of glad to say it.

Dedede stood and stared. "You _must_ be kidding. Go—Go talk to that Waddle Doo friend of yours. I'm _sure_ he knows how to train Healer Dees, I just told him how to. Before I left."

Waddle Doo stepped in front. "While that may be true, it is impossible to train a Healer Dee in such a short time. I'm afraid you'll have to lost this battle," Waddle Doo said as he deactivated the communicator.

Haddle had been watching in amazement, hearing everything about Healer Dees. After a bit of chokes and spits, he finally managed to splutter out some words.

"Waddle Doo, can you train me? As a Healer Dee?"

"Why?" Waddle Doo was slightly surprised. No one had _ever_ asked him this question.

"I don't know, maybe just to make a small contribution to our great army."

There was silence for a while before Waddle Doo nodded. "Okay, then let's get you your wings first."


	13. The Argument

_So... Thirteen chapters, eighty-seven more to go._

_Please review! If you've got nothing nice to say then don't say anything at all..._

* * *

13: The Failure

_Lack of success._

* * *

Bandana Dee's rather hectic life was normal to him. When the king was gone, he had even more work to do. He was kind of by himself now, since Waddle Doo was coaching—and failing—Haddle. To...uh, become a Healer Dee, you know.

Yawning and stretching, Bandana Dee stretched himself since he was _so sleepy_. The whole night—no, he was not playing, how dare you think that—he was signing documents in the king's place. To tell the truth, the only reason why Bandana Dee was doing it, was because he could forge Dedede's signature perfectly—Dedede did not know that, by the way. It went in the same cycle:

_Read. Agree. Stamp. Sign._

Obviously, the king would not always agree with everything. In fact, he rarely agreed. But Bandana Dee only followed his instructions. "Look, while I'm away, I need you to sign all the document and agree. As for the signature, just write a squiggle vaguely similar to mine."

Was that not following his instructions or what?

Bandana Dee walked down the hallway to the entrance of Castle Dedede. He was assigned to patrol the area and making sure the waddle dees were doing their work—which they mostly were. He caught sight of Haddle with his brand new wings that Bandana Dee heard could turn scaly at will.

Exactly at that moment, the gate creaked open.

Bandana Dee's head snapped up in that direction. Expecting the usual old mailman, Bandana Dee sighed and walked up to the gate. He saw none other than His Majesty.

"Oh. His Majesty! Your Majesty! His Majesty is back! Your Majesty! I have waited for your arrival for more than a week, how could you have abandoned your pitiful servant? Do you know how many—"

"Cut the crap," Dedede snarled. "My ship is wrecked and I want it repaired."

"It seems Great King has forgotten we only have an army, and we do not do ship repairs," Bandana Dee said firmly. "You will have to consult a ship expert on this." He was not quite sure if _anyone_ knew how to repair a ship.

"Useless beings," Dedede muttered. "I'll give you a salary raise, then."

"Say what you will, we will not magically be able to know how to repair ships." Bandana Dee felt proud of himself that he had managed to beat Dedede down; he even bothered to swagger down the hallway.

"_Someone's_ happy," a very familiar voice drawled. Waddle Doo raised his only brow in confusion. "Now, what made you feel so high and mighty?"

Bandana Dee stood up straighter, snorting. Haddle was by Waddle Doo's side, flapping his wings in confusion as well. "I managed to beat Great King in a rather not-so-argumentative argument," Bandana Dee said proudly. "And that, to me, is a great accomplishment."

Haddle stared at Bandana Dee, overawed. "...Just, _wow_. I didn't know _anyone_ could beat Great King in an argument."

"The last time I gave him toasted bread and he complained it was bread, when he asked for toast," Waddle Doo mumbled. "I didn't really get his point—but as loyal servant, we just _have_ to obey him."

As their conversation droned on, I'm sure you understand you can _never_ beat Dedede in an argument. And Bandana Dee just broke that fantasy.


	14. The Delivery

_...One, two three—BAM! It's been two weeks. Augh, time flies. And I really should be updating my other stories._

_Oh by the way guys... These few chapters have been more centered on Bandana Dee. Actually, Bandana Dee is actually the main character of this story, but I can't just ignore Waddle Doo, can I? So, while this chapter is centered on Bandana Dee, the next few chapters will be on Waddle Doo._

_**coleypepwars3679**: APPLES? THAT, SIR, IS NOT A LEGIT EXCUSE.  
Yes, that is VERY MUCH better._

_Please review! I mean, like... Why would you not want to review?_

* * *

14: The Delivery

_The action of delivering letters, packages, or ordered goods._

* * *

I'm sure you know what a delivery is. Be it mail, packages, or "_Pizza hut delivery! 6222 6111!_", you _know_ the importance of delivery. If the delivery isn't sent, then how is the receiver supposed to receive the delivered goods?

Bandana Dee was summoned by Dedede, his fat good-for-nothing king. "Yes, Great King?" he asked, kneeling on one...um, _knee_.

The king laughed, not at all grateful Bandana Dee had stopped his game of Go Fish with Haddle and Waddle Doo just to answer Dedede's summon. Bandana Dee felt a flicker of annoyance. "I need you to deliver this letter, to Princess Korkat. I don't want that slow mailman doing it, you have to find a faster way, and if you don't, you're _fired_!"

This caused Bandana Dee to have a slight shock. He didn't want to get _fired_, and ther wasn't any faster... Oh, the silly king just wanted Bandana Dee to be fired. Straightening up his posture, Bandana Dee saluted. "Yes sir. It shall be delivered immediately, without any delay. Permission to leave?"

Dedede was slightly surprised. "Er...yeah."

Bandana Dee smirked to himself as he exited the throne room. He put his back to the wall—the area right next to the door to the throne room—and pushed, very similar to what he did when he and Waddle Doo were escaping Meta Knight. The wall rotated with him, and Bandana Dee walked down the green hallway to a door to the Minion Hallways. He was now in Corridor 174.

He took the Transporter to Corridor 200 and then leaped off. He walked to a rather lone corner of the hallway, and pushed a certain brick that opened up the pathway. As soon as Bandana Dee was in the pathway, the pathway was closed again.

Bandana Dee walked down the dark corridor, but was not afraid at all. He knew what was at the end. Once he reached a white door, he pushed, and then he was in a room with light.

"Welcome to the Secret Post Office," the receptionist said. The receptionist was a violet puffball and was apparently very old, had glasses...and was a _she_. She was an elderly lady, in any case. "What can I do for you, dear?"

"Um... Delivery to Princess Korkat." Bandana Dee rummaged in his bandana, where he stored the letter, and passed it to the elderly lady.

"Princess Korkat? Isn't she rather near Pupu Village, dear?" she asked, surprised.

"It's the king again, Mrs. Garret," Bandana Dee replied, sighing. Mrs. Garret, the receptionist, blinked and adjusted her glasses, then nodded.

"Ah... I see. No problem. It shall be delivered in two days, thank you. Have a nice day, dear." Mrs. Garret gave Bandana Dee a small wave before Bandana Dee left the Secret Post Office with a _ping_.

Ha, he had just beaten Dedede in his game of sorts.


	15. The Pork

_Time for the fifteenth chapter! Eighty-five more to go! Wow, school already started...and I haven't missed a single day!_

_**coleypepwars3679**: OHHH NO. IT'S GOING UP. QUICK. HIDE. TAKE SHELTER. *dives under piles of blankets*_

_Please review! That also means the lurkers._

* * *

15: The Pork  


_The flesh of pig used as food._

* * *

"I, have, uh," Bandana Dee started, "cleaning duties today. And since this castle is huge, I won't be back until night at the Minion Hallways..."

"I have to serve the king. You know, be there to do His Stupidity's demands," Waddle Doo groaned. "Where's Haddle?"

"Oh, your _apprentice_?" Bandana Dee had started to call Haddle Waddle Doo's apprentice. "I believe he's trying to heal the willow tree by the pond with that gazebo from a sickness."

"Oh, _that_ tree," Waddle Doo sympathetically.

"Yeah. Uh, I kinda have to go now. See ya." Bandana Dee waved as he left.

Waddle Doo sighed as he walked and knocked politely on the throne room's door. "Hello," he began, "I am Waddle Doo, the one you requested for...to serve you for the day until 9:30PM."

There was a sneeze. "Oh yeah! Come in."

Slightly disturbed by the sneeze, Waddle Doo pushed the door open and crept in. "Hello," he said again, closing the door behind him. "How may I help you, Great King?"

"Get me a snack," Dedede demanded. "Pork will do. Step on it."

Waddle Doo nodded. "Yes, Great King." He closed the door and hurried off to the kitchen, where all the waddle dees were preparing grand food for Princess Korkat's arrival. "Get the Great King something porky. And step on it."

The waddle dees nodded. After bringing out a huge pork, and cooking it, the waddle dees handed it to Waddle Doo. Waddle Doo stared, blinking, before shaking his head.

"No, step on it, guys. That's what the king said. _Step on it_. Do you follow?"

After a couple of blank stares, the waddle dees finally got the message. They plopped the plate on the floor before jumping all over it, causing the pork to be rather...unsightly, before handing it to Waddle Doo. "That's better," Waddle Doo said, nodding approvingly.

The spherical cyclops ran down the hallways, twisting left and right, before finally arriving at the grand door. "Permission to enter," he said loudly.

"Enter," Dedede yawned. Waddle Doo stepped in and set out the foldable table that minions must always keep in their rucksack they always must carry and set it down in front of the king. "Why is my food all squished?"

Waddle Doo blinked, puzzled. "You _did_ tell me to step on it, Great King..."


	16. The Tray

_So...this was posted later than usual because I had no inspiration. Maybe you could review and give me some ideas. That would be nice. (But if I don't use your idea, don't whine like a baby.)_

_**coleypepwars3679**: *is still under blankets* NOOO ARGH I WILL NEVER COME OUT!_

_Please review! For uh...ideas? No flaming, please!_

* * *

16: The Tray

_A flat, shallow container with a raised rim, typically used for carrying food and drink, or for holding small items._

* * *

"Princess Korkat, Princess Korkat, Princess Korkat is here~" Waddle Doo hummed. "Oh dear, my goodness, what bunch of _stupid_ lyrics we're supposed to sing," he sighed. "Oh crud, she's coming about now."

"Waddle Doo! I found you!" Haddle shrieked. "Oh my gosh, Princess Korkat's ship is arriving, and we're _late_! Oh gosh, _late late late_! We're going to _die_!"

"Haddle, calm down," Waddle Doo exclaimed, alarmed. "She's c-coming? R-Really?"

Haddle nodded miserably. "Yes, she is, and we're late... And we're supposed to present her a medal of some sort for arriving at Castle Dedede. Oh no, oh no, _oh no_..."

Waddle Doo panicked. "Haddle, keep calm. Is the ship here yet?"

"Not yet, _very soon_..."

"Then get us there. Fly me over there, Haddle, and quick."

Haddle, too miserable to properly gather up his thoughts, nodded and grabbed Waddle Doo as they flew down the hallway.

_Crud, we're doomed, we're doomed, we're **REALLY** doomed..._

Then they saw a note stuck on the floor.

_To any random minion,_

_In the kitchen, there is a tray with a cursive "Princess Korkat" in pink. I want you to bring it, NOW. It doesn't matter WHO you are. Throw this away once you see this._

_Your Super Great King_

Haddle sighed. "We can at least escape this way... C'mon, I'm sure I saw Dedede making a tray under someone's lesson, or something. I bet he made one of the minions to write it out, 'cause he's just _bone lazy_..."

"You're right," Waddle Doo agreed. "To the kitchen we go."

Haddle picked the spherical cyclops up again, and began twisting down the hallways, flying so fast that Haddle was afraid his wings might just detach itself mid-flight. Thankfully, it didn't. Haddle was really getting used to it, wasn't he?

Waddle Doo opened the kitchen door to reveal a bunch of waddle dees preparing food for the great dinner Dedede and Princess Korkat were about to have. "Waddle dees, I need a tray that has _Princess Korkat_ on it in pink cursive!" Waddle Doo yelled. As being a species of his own kind, Waddle Doo had more power over the waddle dees, but never abused his power.

The waddle dees handed Waddle Doo a tray with a plate and a few cookies on it. Haddle flew Waddle Doo over to Dedede, who was planning to give it to Princess Korkat.

"Great King! Here it is."

"Oh, great, no _wonder_ you didn't attend the ceremony," Dedede said grumpily. The two watched as Dedede presented it to Princess Korkat—

—only for it to crumble and break.

Waddle Doo blinked, before they both burst out in laughter. "Dedede created it miserably," Haddle said through his laughter. "We held it lightly, so it didn't break, but he held it too tight, it just went _smash_!"

After all, you could never really teach Dedede _anything good_, could you?


	17. The Meat

_Hi! Another chapter! I still want you guys to give me ideas, if any... But I'd like something I can use anytime, not at a fixed point._

_**coleypepwas3679**: LOL. I was planning something like that, then I was like "bah forget it" but I might as well just use it now. But I'm going to use it for chapter 99, if that's okay. But I going to change the title to something like "The Death" or "The Demise" or something like that because perish is a VERB, and I need a noun. A noun is better._

_Please review! Gimme ideas! Then you'll have more chapters! :D_

* * *

17: The Meat

_The flesh of an animal as food._

* * *

"Serve it serve it serve it serve it—"

Bandana Dee, Waddle Doo and Haddle were rushing. It was time for Princess Korkat's dinner. Apparently, she was staying for three days before she left, and apparently Dedede wanted to...uh, _court_ her before she did.

Haddle spluttered as he took the tray. "Why is it veggies?"

"I'm not sure, but Chefee made it all vegetables, because he said _it needs to be done that way_," Bandana Dee replied. Chefee was the head chef of the kitchen. "I heard that Dedede made some chicken for Princess Korkat. I feel sorry for her."

"Yeah," Waddle Doo sighed. "Maybe the princess likes veggies."

Suddenly Dedede stormed in. "Hey!"

"Y-Y-Your Majesty!" Waddle Doo exclaimed. "Aren't you eating with Princess Korkat?"

"I told her I needed the toilet. Anyway, so far, it has only been vegetables. _What_ is with that?" Dedede demanded angrily, pointing at the rest of the vegetable dishes. One stood out, though. It was Dedede's chicken.

Bandana Dee realized with some horror that Dedede's chicken was completely _black_.

_I have to ask what ingredients he put in. I have to ask Chefee later. Totally._

"W-Well, you said the chicken must c-come last—" Haddle said nervously.

"I don't care! Serve it now, after I return!" Dedede snarled and stormed off.

"Chefee," Bandana Dee called. The chief-of-the-kitchen waddle dee looked at Bandana Dee. "What ingredients did Your Craziness put in the chicken?"

"O-Oh, well, about that... He put mustard, onions, sunny-side-ups, and cheese inside. He cut a small hole then put everything in, you see." Chefee nervously looked at the blackened chicken. "And it seems he fried it for too long... Well, he did not want my guidance."

Haddle, torn in between the choices ot listening further or delivering it, placed a hand on the plate containing the black chicken. "Ew, complete gross DDD Chicken."

"Good name," Waddle Doo praised.

Finally, with a shove from Bandana Dee, Haddle flew out and came into the dining room. The fresh scent of well-cooked vegetables filled his nostrils as he sighed. _Much better than the DDD Chicken, I'm sure._ "Here—! I'm sorry we were so late, a bit of a ruckus kicked up, and I—"

"Yeah, whatever. Here, Princess Korkat! One of my finest—"

"—DDD Chicken. Very well-made with—" Haddle interrupted.

Dedede flicked Haddle. "Try it!"

"Oh! Um..." Princess Korkat blinked. "Well, I apologize, but I'm vegetarian."

Dedede looked as if he shattered into a million pieces.

"W-Well, just try it, then! I made it specially."

"Princess, I beg of you, _don't_ take it!" Haddle shrieked as she cut a small piece out and lifted it to her mouth. "It's filed with mustard, onions, sunny-side-ups and cheese!"

Too late. It was in her mouth.

Korkat choked and spluttered on it. "Y-Your cooking, I swear," she began, "is probably the worst I've eaten in my entire life. Next time, I just want the waddle dees to cook for me, and you _will not_ try to cook anything for me."

With that, Korkat stood up and left to her room in the castle.

"_That's_ why it's all veggies," Chefee sighed. "In her letter, which Dedede didn't bother to read, since he knew she had accepted his invitation, she stated she was vegetarian. I tried to tell Your Idiocy that, but he wouldn't listen."

"Feeding her mustard, onions, sunny-side-ups and cheese in a chicken while she's vegetarian," Waddle Doo muttered. "Way to go, Your Stupidity."


	18. The Fight

_Oh, argh. It's been eighteen days already. Not that that's a bad thing... This is one of the slightly longer chapters, I think._

_I AM STILL COLLECTING IDEAS!_

_**coleypepwars3679**: Nope, he does NAWT.  
OMG! *scrounges for blankets, bolsters, pillows and whatnot and dives under a pile of them*_

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Good idea! I'll be using that for the next chapter, since I already have an idea for this chapter._

_Please review!_

* * *

18: The Fight

_A violent confrontation or struggle._

* * *

"He has _wings_, I tell you—these huge, red wings. I heard he only _just_ got the, but—really? This just sucks," Haddle sulked. Apparently, Retarded Bonkers had gained red wings just recently. He had never used them yet, though. "I tell you, these castle is getting weirder and stupider, day by day."

"Yeh complain about mah wings?" R. Bonkers stood there, arms crossed, with his wings spread widely.

Haddle, who had been being quite prideful lately, nodded and spread out his own wings that he had used and trained. "Yes, I complain about _your_ wings, that you don't even deserve any. You are a land fighter; not an air fighter. _Face_ it."

R. Bonkers raised his hammer, but Bandana Dee blocked it with his spear. "R. Bonkers, hit him and I'll make sure you'll _never_ use that hammer of yours again," he threatened.

"Hmph, not mah problem."

"If it's a fight you want, a fight you'll _get_," Waddle Doo hissed.

"How am I gonna get back to Great King, then?"

"You will have to swallow your stubborn pride and drag yourself back there," Haddle snapped.

R. Bonkers looked as if his entire pride had just been shattered. He stared at Haddle for a while. "Swallow mah stubborn pride?"

At the sight of R. Bonkers being shocked, Haddle stood up straighter, stretching his magnificent wings. "Yes, you _heard_ me. You will have to swallow your stubborn pride and drag your shameful self to meet the king. Or do you need to dig your ear wax out?"

Something in R. Bonkers snapped and he raised his hammer. The trio saw where this was going, and they knew that _this was not going to happen in the canteen_. So, running off, they headed towards the field.

Once they reached the large, grassy field, Haddle shot up higher, so he could look down at R. Bonkers smugly. Bandana Dee and Waddle Doo stayed on the ground, watching R. Bonkers as he inched towards them slowly.

R. Bonkers pounced.

Haddle pounced.

Haddle got there first.

Yelping in pain, R. Bonkers furiously tried to shake Haddle off while Haddle was sinking his now-scaly wings into R. Bonkers back. "When could _you_ turn your wings from feathery to scaly?" R. Bonkers demanded.

"Since forever!" Haddle replied, and was shaken off by R. Bonkers, and landed on his back. "You _piece of shit_—"

Managing to scamper under R. Bonkers and sneak behind him, Bandana Dee planned to give the red Bonkers a rough shove. Before he could, R. Bonkers whirled around and lifted his hammer and aimed a strike at Bandana Dee. Bandana Dee let out a high-pitched squeak. His survival instincts kicked in and he flung himself in R. Bonkers' face, blocking his view.

Waddle Doo stood and tried to sort out his Beam powers and his eye suddenly crackled. _Yay!_ he thought. _It's working again!_ He unintentionally released a Wave Beam at R. Bonkers, causing the scarlet Bonkers to fall down, and so did Bandana Dee.

Aggravated, R. Bonkers used his wings and flapped up higher, preparing to smash down on the rather fazed Bandana Dee. Haddle, having more practice, shot up and pulled on R. Bonkers' leg, pausing him in his actions for a while before Haddle was flung off with a furious shake of the leg. Bandana Dee snapped out of his daze and pushed himself of the ground and shot up into the air.

While jump-floating was less efficient and slower than wings, R. Bonkers had only just received his wings and had never used them. Bandana Dee, on the other hand, had been practicing furiously ever since he learned the jump-float.

In this case, jump-floating beat flying.

Bandana Dee threw himself downwards after he was above R. Bonkers. At that same time, Waddle Doo released yet another Wave Beam at his target, and Haddle threw himself at the side of his foe.

All their attacks hit with a _smash_.

R. Bonkers was flung to the ground, head hitting the ground hard. He was lost in the sea of unconsciousness... For now.

"Geez," Waddle Doo said, snickering. "And they never even train us to fight."

"I think R. Bonkers does," Haddle said, puzzled, "so why do we beat him?"

"I just think," Bandana Dee said, "that R. Bonkers is all muscle, no brain."


	19. The Sleepover

_Nineteen days already! That's basically eighty-one more days to go, and two more days to two weeks!_

_I AM STILL COLLECTING IDEAS, THANK YOU VERY MUCH._

_Credit to **Destiny Willowleaf** for providing me with the idea for this chapter!_

_Please review!_

* * *

19: The Sleepover

_An occasion of spending the night away from home, usually at another house._

* * *

"HA!" Haddle threw a fluffy pillow at Waddle Doo. The spherical cyclops looked unamused as he tugged on his sleeping cap, narrowing his eye, clearly annoyed with Haddle's childish behavior. "HA! GOT YOU IN THE FACE, WADDLE DOO, HA HA HA HA HA—"

_WHAM!_ Obviously not tolerating this, Waddle Doo shot back another pillow with much force. Haddle fell over with a "Oof!" but his wings instincts kicked in and flapped up hurriedly. "Guys, I thought you said sleepover," Bandana Dee said, exasperated, "not _hyper pillow fight_."

"Well"—_SLAP!_—"sorry that"—_WHAM!__—_"Haddle started this nonsense"—_CRASH!_—"but it's actually"—_BAM!_—"pretty"—_BOOM!_—"fun," Waddle Doo replied while catching (and sometimes failing) and throwing pillows at Haddle.

"Stop it or you'll ruin something!" Bandana Dee yelled. He tugged on his bandana, drifting into serious mode, before jumping around and collecting the pillows at the speed of light. "Okay, can we be more civilized?"

"We are," Waddle Doo said in a serious manner. "_Very_ civilized, actually."

"Are you now?" Bandana Dee wondered aloud.

"Compared to Your Stupidity Dipshit."

"NO ONE EVER SAID I WAS COMPARING YOU TO THAT MEAT-HEAD!" Bandana Dee roared. "Meat-head" had become his insult, as of late. "Anyway, aside from that, Haddle, what did you bring from your room?"

Haddle opened his rucksack. "I brought Speed cards!" he said cheerily.

_Great. Speed demon brings Speed cards. We are so doomed._

"I hate real-time card games!" Waddle Doo yelled. "They're so annoying!"

"Party-pooper," Haddle grumbled.

"Party-_popper_," Waddle Doo corrected.

"Pooper!"

"Popper!"

"Pooper!"

"Popper!"

"Just shut up!" Bandana Dee screeched. _(It's actually party-pooper.)_ "We're playing Speed, and that's that! Waddle Doo, if you don't want to play, then _don't_, because _I don't care if you don't wanna_." With that, he grabbed the box, took out the cards and began giving them out.

Meanwhile, Haddle and Waddle Doo had a glaring contest.

After a long game of slapping down cards—and occasionally slapping down hands ("Ouch! Bandana Dee! That's my _hand_!" "Oh, sorry, Waddle Doo.")—Haddle finally won, yelling, "Speed!"

"I guessed as much," Bandana Dee grumbled to himself.

The night went on with much yelling, screeches (from Bandana Dee, of course), shrieks of triumph, and basically, a lot of commotion. Their roommates who were sadly enduring it, glanced at each other, then shrugged, as if saying_they're crazy, but oh well, everyone's allowed to have a little fun sometimes._


	20. The Tram

_OMG! I could only just *pant* post *pant* this *pant* thing. *huge pant which turns into a barf*_

_**Lokaio**: Hi new reviewer! Thanks for the review! YES! This is the 20th chapter already. Wow, time flies... Oh, and don't worry if you can't think of any ideas. After all, sinc I'm the author, I should be writing most of the ideas myself, right?_

_Please review! Lurkers, lovers, flamers—actually, no. No flamers._

* * *

20: The Tram

_A bus-like vehicle._

* * *

Bandana Dee stared, overawed.

How many times had he been overawed lately?

He didn't know.

And you don't need to know.

"Now listen up, you miserable, lazy minions!" Dedede yelled through the megaphone, standing on a small wooden crate that served as a platform.

"Annnnnd vice versa," Waddle Doo mumbled, crossing his arms and tapping his foot.

"To reduce your...uh...walking...route... I have installed uhm...buses!" Dedede yelled.

A waddle dee stepped up and handed him a note. Coughing slightly, Dedede put a clenched fist up to his mouth. "Ahem... By that, I mean open-sided trams." He nodded, pleased with himself. "In all the castle hallways, I have made a tram route, and tram stations where you wait for your tram, or get off your tram. Each tram station has a number, so that you may identify the place you are in. Each open-sided tram has a number as well, because different numbers will have different routes."

Dedede was about to end his speech when the same waddle dee stepped up and handed him another note. "Ah, yes. For the stronger enemies, not the common enemies like waddle dees or waddle doos, you will be able to take the purple tram, which is faster. It travels on the exterior of the castle. That is all, thank you."

He walked away.

Determined to try out a tram ride—especially an open-sided one, if he may add—Bandana Dee grabbed Waddle Doo and Haddle and raced off to the nearest tram station—which was Station 47. Bandana Dee hauled them on the waiting seats, kicking his feet.

They waited for only a short period of time before Tram 80 came. It was one of the five trams that stopped here to get to the Minion Hallways. The others being 81, 82, 101 and 153.

They hopped in and squished at the side. Bandana Dee decided he loved open-sided trams. As they started their journey to the Minion Hallways, Bandana Dee began squealing, earning a rather annoyed look by Haddle, who was trying to enjoy the breeze.

As they passed a hallway with one open-side, Haddle stretched. "I can see the purple tram up ahead," he whispered. "It's fast, but looks delicate. ...Hey, it's that jerk R. Bonkers."

"_After_ we taught him a fine spanking? That guy has the balls," Waddle Doo snorted.

_THUMP! THUMP! THUMP!_

The color drained from Bandana Dee's face. "Oh dear Nova, don't tell me he's..."

_THUMP! THUMP! THUMP!_

Haddle nodded solemnly, sighing as he shook his head. "That imbecile _is_, Bandana Dee."

_THUMP! THUMP! THUMP!_

Waddle Doo played with a strand of his hair. "He's gonna give the tram a dent. I sympathize."

_THUMP! THUMP—CRAAAAASH!_

They saw a red figure shoot down and after a while, heard a _splash_. The red figure had wings, but its wings were not well-trained for instinctive reaction. Smiling, Bandana Dee laughed and so did the rest of them.

"Even worse, he made a hole!" Bandana Dee said through laughter.


	21. The Shriek

_OMG THREE WEEKS ALREADY! TIME DOES NOT FLY, IT SHOOTS LIKE AN ARROW! AND I AM STILL COLLECTING IDEAS!_

_**coleypepwars3679**: Ch 18 - YEAH WHY DIDN'T YOU?  
Ch 19 - Pardon me asking, but what is Warriors?  
Ch 20 - I apologize for being rude, but that was completely...unrealistic. (Haha, you're a fine one to talk, Techno.)_

_**Clove31**: Yup, everyone loves that part, don't you?_

_**WarpedInsanity**: Hi new reviewer! Welcome! Of course there are female waddle dees, but I just never bring them up. I would love to add Maddy! And, um, no romance. I do not do romance.  
Just a question, for Maddy, do you want to give me her appearance or am I allowed to decide that for myself? (Of course no girly clothes. *barfs*)_

_Please review! It would be nice if you did._

* * *

21: The Shriek

_A high-pitched piercing cry or sound; a scream._

* * *

Bandana Dee had been frantically running around like crazy, thinking all the while _stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid YOUR STUPIDITY!_ while nearly tripping over his feet. _I WILL GET MY __REVENGE._

Waddle Doo scrambled over to Bandana Dee, who was furiously doing research on Princess Korkat, since she was about to leave the next day. (She had prolonged her visit, since her ship had been experiencing difficulties.)

"Bandana Dee. It's awful," he groaned, clutching his eye in despair.

"You need not exaggerate, Sir Can-See-Bandana-Dee-Is-At-Hard-Work," Bandana Dee snapped as he wrote down more notes on his notebook.

"It really is. Oh, poor Haddle. He's going to make everyone deaf."

"What?" Bandana Dee dropped his pencil, allowing it to clatter on the floor. "What happened to Haddle?"

Waddle Doo did not reply, but instead dragged Bandana Dee out of his study. Haddle was outside, tilting his head in curiosity as Bandana Dee looked puzzled. Of course, Bandana Dee thought there was nothing wrong with Haddle...

Clearing his throat, Bandana Dee nodded nervously. "Uh, hi, Haddle."

Haddle smiled brightly. "HI!" he yelled, loudly. Bandana Dee flinched. "HOW IS YOUR DAY?"

"See what I meant?" Waddle Doo said miserably. "Haddle, can you talk any softer?"

"NO," Haddle said apologetically. "THE MAGICIAN DEE SAID THE SPELL WOULD LAST UNTIL THE END OF THE DAY. SORRY."

"What happened?" Bandana Dee questioned.

"See, Haddle was chasing a butterfly that he felt like killing." Haddle nodded seriously. "He ran into the Magic Room, and accidentally got in the way of one of the Magician Dee's spell. Accordingly to the Magician, who I think is called Spaggy, or something—"

"Spaggy, the one named after spaghetti?"

"I believe so. Spaggy apologized to Haddle a lot of times even though it was mainly Haddle's fault for getting in the way of the spell. Spaggy also mentioned that it would last until _today twelve midnight_." Waddle Doo looked around anxiously. "The spell, however, makes the victim unaware of it, but the others will here a scream or a shout, even though the victim does not intend so. I think it is called a Yell Spell. Haddle didn't know it until I told him."

"Spaggy didn't tell him?"

"Considering it's Spaggy, Spaggy probably told Haddle a really jumbled up and complicated with much calculation of the spell. Poor Haddle probably didn't even understand anything," Waddle Doo said, sighing.

"WILL NOT TALK UNLESS NECESSARY," Haddle reminded.

"Ah, yes, Haddle won't talk unless absolutely necessary." Waddle Doo nodded, pleased with himself for adding the "absolutely".

Bandana Dee was just hit with an idea. "Haddle," Bandana Dee started, "you won't be able to hear your own loud voice, but instead your usual, quieter voice, isn't it?"

Haddle nodded.

Bandana Dee grinned. Oh, his lovely revenge was so near... "Okay then, follow me."

Haddle and Waddle Doo followed Bandana Dee down the long, twisting corridors of Castle Dedede. They reached the throne room's door. Bandana Dee opened the door carefully. "Great King," Bandana Dee said respectfully.

Dedede yawned, stretching. "What," he demanded, with a bored tone.

"Since Princess Korkat's voice is, um, very soft," Bandana Dee said, "we have come to give you hearing training." Korkat _did_ have quite a soft voice, and was sometimes even _hardly audible_.

"Oh? Go ahead, then."

"Haddle will be your trainer. Good luck." Bandana Dee whispered something into Haddle's ear before he quickly dragged himself and Waddle Doo out of the room. They walked away from the door until they were on the opposite side of the hallway.

Inside the throne room, Dedede rolled his eyes at Haddle. "What? Start your stupid training, then."

Taking a deep breath in, Haddle shrieked.

"_AAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! _"

Dedede covered his ears, jumping away from Haddle.

"_EEEEEEEEEERRGRRGGHHHHEEEEEEE!_"

Outside, Bandana Dee smiled.

What a truly glorious revenge.


	22. The Departure

_OH MY GOSH, GUYS! I'M SO SORRY I COULDN'T UPDATE YESTERDAY! I was really busy and I had no time..._

_Oh, and if you don't have an account and you're reviewing as...uh...Guest, could you please at least like, um, name yourself? So I can tell the difference._

_**kirbyfan1996**: I'm very glad you like it!_

_**Guest**: Good idea! I'll use it in the next chapters...or so. Yeah, I'll be doing something like a mini arc for that. Can't fit everything in one chapter. Oh, and if you're going to review this story again...could you please like, uh, how would you say it? Name yourself, and don't just put "Guest"? Because if other people put "Guest", I will be very confused. Thank you! (I'll use your idea. For later chapters. Like coming-very-soon chapters, because I'm not done with this Princess Korkat business yet.)_

_Please review! And just so you know, yes, I am still collecting ideas!_

* * *

22: The Departure

_The act of leaving._

* * *

"She's leaving _TODAY_! _**TODAY**_! _**EVERYONE IS TO WORK HARD**_!" All of the minions could hear Dedede's wild screaming as he ran down the hallway. Bandana Dee blinked at the unusual attitude of their king. "GET READY! _**GET THE WHOLE CASTLE READY**_!"

"Castle ready..? For what?" Waddle Doo wondered.

"For the marriage, between Your Idiocy and Princess Korkat," Haddle supplied. He had recovered from the Yell Spell from yesterday. "Oh, ugh. My throat feels _horrible_."

"That's a side effect of the Yell Spell," Bandana Dee said. "Spaggy told me yesterday before I went to bed. I came across him while walking back to my room. Spaggy stays at Room 18, Corridor 223, just one room apart from us, so I saw him."

"At least I killed the butterfly," Haddle said, shrugging. Waddle Doo shuddered, not wanting to think about any sort of brutal murder right then.

"ROLL THE STUPID CARPET! No, not the red one! The white one!"

The trio helped to set up the millions of chairs. The marriage, it seemed, was taking place in the throne room. Bandana Dee, Waddle Doo and Haddle marched forward to Dedede—as you should always march in the presence of Dedede—and Bandana Dee took out a neatly folded piece of paper in his bandana.

Dedede looked impatiently at Bandana Dee as the waddle dee with a blue bandana began going through the plan. "First, prepare marriage. Check?" He turned to see the final touches. "Second, wedding cake with Great King and Princess Korkat figurines on top made out of icing, so it is edible."

Waddle Doo turned on his walky-talky. "#2768 here. Is the wedding cake ready? Over. ...Ah, good. Over and out."

"Brilliant," Bandana Dee muttered sarcastically under his breath. "Third, polish the golden dining cart that will hold the wonderful wedding cake."

"Ugh," Waddle Doo groaned, and Dedede shot him a glare. "...Hello? #2768 here. I'm with Your Maj. Is the golden dining cart polished? Spick and span? Over. Oh? It is? Shining, sparkling and dazzling? Good. Brilliant. Over and out."

"Good. Fourth, get Great King to dress up in...black tuxedo," Bandana Dee spluttered. "Black tuxedo will be located in Closet Room."

"Here," Dedede said, holding up the black tuxedo.

"Alright... Fifth and final step. Proposal." Bandana Dee nodded, folded the paper back, and put it back neatly in his bandana.

Dedede went to somewhere to change into his tuxedo, when there was a newer voice. "Ouch! Augh, don't do that. _No_, don't touch my hat."

A waddle dee with a magician hat that sat on his head came up running to the trio. "Oh! There you are! Oh, gee..."

"Spaggy?" Haddle looked at the Magician. "Oh. _Hi_!" he said cheerfully. Spaggy was a nice person. You could hardly get angry with him, and it was Haddle's fault he got in the way of the spell.

"Oh, Haddle, hello. I'm still going to—to do that spell, the one that will help to soothe your throat—Medical Soothing Spell?—but right now, I have very important news." He puffed. "We have not seen Princess Korkat all day. We being the Magicians. We were supposed to distract Princess Korkat away from the throne room, you see, but we never saw her."

"And? That woman is probably just preparing to leave this god-awful place," Waddle Doo sniffed. "Oh, Mother... Why did you have to send me here?"

"And we saw her ship," Spaggy said solemnly. "She may have already left."

Bandana Dee jerked forward as his eyes widened. "_Left already_? Oh my goodness, this is _bad news_, I tell you..."

As if on cue, Dedede walked out, fully dressed in his black tuxedo. "Well? Where is Princess Korkat?"

For a while, the minions said nothing. Bandana Dee decided to play a nasty trick on his king. Make him wait the whole day. "Well, Great King, it appears she has not risen from her peaceful slumber. Let us wait for her to fully get ready for the day."

The other three minions smiled. What a very long day for His Impatiences.


	23. The Name

_Chapter 22 was the one that I owed you guys, so this is the proper chapter as of today!_

_Also...BOO! This chapter reveals Waddle Doo's name! As in, THE Waddle Doo we have been following. I was thinking about it, and, there are many waddle doos in Castle Dedede, and our Waddle Doo is just one of them. While we still refer to him as Waddle Doo, if there happens to be a case where there is another waddle doo, we will call him by his name...okay?  
_

_Please review! I am still collecting ideas!_

* * *

23: The Name

_A word or set of words by which a person, animal, place or thing is known, addressed, or referred to._

* * *

Haddle had been thinking about it quite daily. He had been thinking about his name. About Bandana Dee's name. Then about Waddle Doo's name. Then the realization hit him. _Hey, what **is** Waddle Doo's proper name?_

Thus, Haddle confronted Bandana Dee about it in the canteen, where Bandana Dee was slurping down some noodles, since Waddle Doo had duty at that moment, and could not be disturbed. "Bandana Dee!" Haddle greeted. Bandana Dee waved back to him. "I was just wondering, how did you get your name?"

Bandana Dee sat up straighter. This was a subject he loved to talk about. "Ah, my name... _Such a sophisticated name_," he muttered under his breath. "Well, when I was born, my parents could not think of any name for me. They wanted a very unique name. However, they could not think of any. So, they just called me Dee. Dee-Dee, to be precise. When I was growing up, my parents were very troubled. They did not want to call me Dee-Dee in public, as it was a very common nickname. Therefore, they decided to try and find me a good name. I also wanted a name for myself. Thus, my parents allowed me to explore the world a little to see what I wanted to call myself. I looked at flowers, mountains, types of grass, jewels, but none seemed to intrigue me. My parents finally brought my grandma's shop, that sold various types of clothing. I spotted a bandana—the blue bandana I wear in this very moment. It was made of the finest silk. I was truly awed by it, and demanded its name. My grandma, loving me, her grandson, so much, she gave it to me, for free. My parents saw this, and found that it was a great and unique name. However, 'Bandana' sounded too plain. And I was very used to be called 'Dee-Dee'. Therefore, they found the perfect name for me. Bandana Dee."

Haddle stood there, puzzled my Bandana Dee's name life story. He remembered he was called Haddle because the first thing he was intrigued by was a door handle that had been torn off from a door. He still kept that door handle, by the way. His parents thought "Handle" was a silly-sounding name, therefore named him something more interesting, "Haddle".

"Oh. Uh. I see. How did Waddle Doo get his name, then?"

Bandana Dee scoffed. "Waddle Doo has a common peasant name that was randomly given to him by his unloving mother." Of course, Waddle Doo's mother loved Waddle doo very much. It was just that Bandana Dee had his own theories.

Haddle tilted his head. "Oh, really? What is Waddle Doo's name, really?"

Bandana Dee didn't hear Haddle's voice. It was drowned out by his slurping.

Haddle sighed and sat by Bandana Dee, hoping he would eat faster so Haddle could ask him. Haddle was just curious, really. He thought names were very interesting. He wondered what Waddle Doo's name might be. Bandana Dee said Waddle Doo had a common peasant name, and Bandana Dee didn't sound as if he were lying. He went through the list.

Just then, Waddle Doo was relieved of his duty. He came walking straight to the canteen. Bandana Dee brightened.

"Oh, there you are, _Waddle Mitchizuka Doo_!"

"What?"

Haddle sighed. So that was Waddle Doo's name. Mitchizuka.


	24. The Clock

_This, from here, will actually be a mini arc. I'm not sure how many chapters, but not too much._

_**Guest**(chapter 22): Yup, you reviewed and gave me the idea already... I received it by the email. Dunno why it's not up on the "viewing reviews" section._

_**coleypepwars3679**: ch 22 - WUT THAT IS NO EXCUSE MY FRIEND.  
Ch 23 - Don't "WTF" me. NO ONE SHALL "WTF" ME!  
*notices the mark is missing*_

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Ch 19 - You're welcome!  
Ch 23 - That...is a brilliant idea, however, I have not seen it myself yet. But, I will write it down and remember it so I can use it when I DO watch it!_

_Credit to "**Guest**"! Yeah, it was just a Guest, but if you look in the reviews I'm pretty sure you'll know..._

_Please review!_

* * *

24: The Clock

_A mechanical or electrical device for measuring time, typically by hands on a round dial or by displayed figures._

* * *

"Hey!"

Speeding through the hallway, Waddle (Mitchizuka, mind you) Doo crashed into Bandana Dee and Haddle. Bandana Dee yelped before turning around. "Oh, hi. What's up?" he asked.

"The sky," Waddle Doo said dryly. "There's a pendulum clock."

"Really? Where?"

"It's placed outside the recreation room. I don't like it. It's freaky."

"In what sense?" Haddle questioned.

"It just gives off this super ominous aura. _No one_ dares to go near it." Waddle Doo shifted his eye around. "Everyone's been taking the secret passageway to the recreation room now. The one from the throne room."

Bandana Dee tilted his head questioningly, before snapping his head up. "Oh, yes. It was a present from someone. I don't know who. Well...I think the owner of the clock died sometime ago. A relative sent it over, I believe. The owner was some man or something. Wait, um...was it died? He could have just moved away... I, um, don't know, but it was a present because the owner didn't want it. Or couldn't."

Haddle shrugged. "I don't know, let's go see it."

After a while of walking, the trio arrived at the pendulum clock. Bandana Dee shivered; yes, it was indeed creepy. He bravely took a step forward, frowning as he did so. Something was not right. They were not alone. Something else was there.

As he reached forward and barely touched the clock, and—

_"...Hello..."_

Immediately, Bandana Dee's hand shot back. That was crazy! Had he just heard a voice? Spooky ghost? Was it some silly prank? He touched it again, thinking he might be able to identify the voice.

_"...Do you want to play?"_

Nope, definitely _not_ a prank.

Bandana Dee shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. Maybe he hadn't slept enough yesterday. Yes! That must be it!

But, of course it wasn't.


	25. The Ghost

_OH MY GOD GUYS I'm SO SORRY! But my laptop was broken and only NOW my dad decided to do shit and get another one. I d think I owe you like, nine chapters? (whoa more than a week DUDE)_

_**coleypepwars3679**: MEANIE PANTS_

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Yeah, I heard. I'm gonna watch it when I can._

_**Clove 31**: The chapters are meant to be short. And unfortunately, my good friend, I am the one who decides how long each chapter is._

_**shadow kirby 56**: Okay! I have your idea written down, and I'll use it when I can!_

_Please review! And ideas!_

_P.S yesthereisgonnabeasequel *runs off*_

* * *

25: The Ghost

_An apparition of a dead person that is believed to appear or become manifest to the living, typically as a nebulous image._

* * *

The pendulum clock was honestly quite creepy. Bandana Dee didn't like it.

There were many things to dislike about the pendulum clock. It was extremely old and gave off this low moan every time it rung, and after that, there was still the fact that if you touched it, you could hear an odd voice saying _"Do you want to play?"_.

All in all, completely despicable.

Bandana Dee decided to get to the bottom of it immediately. He would not have his men running around like headless chickens just past that stupid hallway. It didn't help that people said there was a haunted spirit living in the pendulum clock. Bandana Dee literally snickered at them.

What was even _funnier_ was that the king himself was terrified of it.

But absolutely no one would dare to touch the clock, so there was no way they could throw the clock out.

With a very arrogant Haddle—well, arrogant and regal—and a terrified Waddle Doo, Bandana Dee marched bravely to the pendulum clock. He tapped it, knowing he would hear that strange voice once again.

_"...Hello."_

"Hello," Bandana Dee responded firmly, eyes locked on the clock.

_"Do you want to play?"_

"What sort of game?" Bandana Dee prompted. Waddle Doo and Haddle realized he was actually _speaking_ with the funny voice. At this, Haddle straightened himself and spread out his wings firmly, while Waddle Doo watched with great interest.

_"Hide-and-seek!"_ Finally, a translucent figure emerged from the clock. Its appearance would not be described. After all, it was a superstition that you should not describes ghosts. However, it was definitely female.

"Why have you been haunting this castle?" Bandana Dee asked instead.

_"Haunting? Oh no. I've merely wanted to play, but all would simply shy away from me. As if I had the rabies."_

"I thought rabies were from dogs," Bandana Dee said, crossing his arms.

The ghost nodded. _"Yes, that's what they've treated me like! A dog!"_ she cheerfully said. _"But dogs can still play hide-and-seek! Why can't they?"_ She spent a few minutes pondering over this.

Bandana Dee blinked—so this was a completely friendly entity that wished to simply play hide-and-seek. "Why can't you ask it less creepily? Like, at least _show_ yourself."

The ghost nodded. _"But if I did, they would still run screaming,"_ she elaborated.

"Why are you in this clock, anyway?"

_"Well, my new husband and I were playing hide-and-seek. I hid in this clock. He never found me. Then I died. Is that simple enough for you?"_ She whirled around Bandana Dee in a friendly manner. _"Who are the other two? The regal one and the terrified one?"_

"The regal one is Haddle," Bandana Dee said. At his name, Haddle straightened (well, any more that he could straighten) and lifted his wings loftily. "And the terrified one is Waddle Doo."

"Not so terrified now," Haddle said for Waddle Doo, gesturing to the spherical cyclops who was staring, overawed, at the ghost.

_"Are we going to play hide-and-seek now? Or—ooh, we could bake a cake!"_

"Isn't there any restriction to ghosthood?" Bandana Dee asked.

_"A few, but they're not really important."_ The ghost licked her fingers. _"Now let's go and bake cakes!"_

And so our trio—more like, team of four—spent the rest of the day baking cakes with a very friendly ghost.


	26. The Horse

_EIGHT MORE UNTIL MY DEBT IS OVER!_

_I won't be able to finish my debt today. I don't think so. But eventually, I'll pay off my debt, and you can't yell at me._

* * *

26: The Horse

_A solid-hoofed plant-eating domesticated mammal with a flowing mane and tail, used for riding, racing, and to carry._

* * *

"...And because of that, we are going to learn how to ride horses."

Bandana Dee blinked. He hadn't really been listening to Haddle's talk. "Er...I'm sorry, what was that?"

Haddle impatiently flicked his left wing. "Because a horse is a faster mode of transport and can carry things, and attach horse wagons and _that is extremely useful_, you know? And that's why we're gonna learn how to ride horses."

This was completely terrifying for some. For some others, it was boring. Or others, it could be exciting.

For Waddle Doo, it was terrifying. For Haddle and Bandana Dee, it was _thrilling_.

The three of them had to share one horse. It was a dapple grey horse that was extremely terrifying to be on. For Waddle Doo, at least. The other two were thrilled. Before they mounted the super-long saddle for three of them to sit on, Bandana Dee scrambled over to the ghost they had befriended a few days ago.

"We're going to ride a horse!" he exclaimed happily.

_"Really?"_ the ghost mused, taking a sit on one of the benches. _"I've done horseback riding just a few times before. It's very exciting. Though, on my first try, it was really quite scary."_

"You got used to it later?"

_"Indeed I did,"_ the ghost said with a bright smile. _"Now run along. I'll be watching."_

Bandana Dee scrambled back to his two friends. Apparently, he was the first, which meant he was in control of the horse, even though Haddle knew how ti ride a horse better than any of them. But Haddle said since _he_ was the one who was doing the archer crap (yes, horseback archery for Haddle), he couldn't ride the horse. So Haddle was in the middle and Waddle Doo was at the back.

"What was his name?" Bandana Dee wondered, stroking the dapple grey horse's mane.

"Giggle," Haddle said.

"What? What's funny?" Bandana Dee said curiously, turning around.

"No, his _name_ is Giggle," Haddle explained.

"...Oh, right." Bandana Dee hadn't known that. "How do I get a horse to start moving?"

"The stirrups. Dig your heels in lightly for a slow trot. Pull the left rein to go left. Pull the right rein to go right. Pull on both reins to get the horse to slow down or stop." Haddle didn't even bother just telling him that one fact. He knew Bandana Dee needed all the information.

"I thought we had to whack the horse with the reins?"

"Please, that's cartoon." Haddle was back to his usual regal self.

They started off finely. Giggle was very well-disciplined, apparently. Haddle said that wasn't the case and Giggle was just being suspicious with the three of them. Waddle Doo could not be any more terrified, though, and began wailing loudly, but shut up when Haddle threatened him, saying that he would make Giggle rear and make Waddle Doo _really_ fall off.

Things got out of hand when R. Bonkers came in on his buffalo. "Ha, ya got a lowly horse."

Fortunately, the ghost floated over. _"The horse looks weird,"_ she said. _"Giggle was his name?"_

"Yeah," Bandana Dee said blankly, ignoring R. Bonkers.

_"He doesn't look half right. His left hind leg is scaly,"_ she said warily, poking Giggle's hind left leg as an experiment. Immediately, Giggle bucked. _"His hind right leg is scaly too. He isn't a horse, I don't think."_

"What are you _saying_?" Before anything else could happen—which included the ghost's retort—Giggle let out something that was definitely not a whinny. More like a roar. Like a tiger's roar. "Oh my _god_!"

_"Stop this creature AT ONCE!"_ the ghost yelled. Bandana Dee didn't even need to be told.

"Waddle Doo! Agh, look behind! Is the leg really scaly? Haddle, check him out too! I'm going to stop the horse—wait, Ghostie"—the ghost cringed at her nickname—"will the controls still work the same?"

_"If it worked earlier, it should work now,"_ the ghost guessed.

Immediately, Waddle Doo let out something between a gasp and a yelp. Bandana Dee couldn't remember—how to stop a horse again? Haddle quickly whirled around. "Pull the reins!"

"I'm sorry, what?" Bandana Dee said as he struggled to stay on.

"PULL THE REINS!"

This time, he was drowned out by the horse's non-horse roar.

Fury began to start bubbling like a kettle with boiling water in Haddle. He was _not_ going to lose to this demonic horse—never.

"PULL THE REINS! _**PULL THE REINS**_!"

The horse had morphed into something completely non-horse—but it was still working on horse controls. Waddle Doo yelled something, but Bandana Dee couldn't hear. He jerked on the reins steadily, and the "horse" pulled its now-long silver neck back. It let out a ring of smoke through its nostrils.

_"Pretty odd horse you have there,"_ the ghost commented dryly. _"I believe it is a creature which can cast illusions."_

At this point, the three of them wanted to laugh straight at R. Bonkers at _his_ lousy buffalo. In fact, they did, and he simply snorted in agitation and stalked away.

Yep, they had a silver dragon that was named Giggle.


	27. The Rescue

_Since now I owe you today, I owe you guys back to nine chapters. ARGH. I hope I finish this "debt" soon. I hate owing people._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Ch 25 - Yup—sequel sequel sequel. I know what I'm gonna write on the sequel, but of course, that would be a major spoiler. So no telling.  
Ch 26 - Yes, you read that correctly. Dragon. Say it with me. Draaaagon._

_**coleypepwars3679**: Sometimes, your reviews are nothing more than exclamations or surprise. But they are really...gratifying._

_Please review! And credit to **shadow kirby 56** for the idea! (P.S ONE OF THE LONGER CHAPTERS YAY)_

* * *

27: The Rescue

_Save (someone) from a dangerous or distressing situation._

* * *

"I am not fond of dragon poop," Waddle Doo stated firmly one day.

"No one is," Bandana Dee said blankly.

"But their dribble is healthy," Haddle observed. Waddle Doo blanched. "It's sorta sticky—feels like cooling slime. Very good for treating injuries. You take the dragon dribble then you use a cloth and put the dragon dribble on the cloth and wrap it around the injury. Very, very fast way of healing."

_"Something's happening,"_ the ghost said, floating back. She had gone to spy on Dedede. _"Something very bad is happening in the throne room. You'd better come."_ Ghosts _always_ had to be vague, didn't they? Maybe when they entered ghosthood they became like that.

The four of them—five, actually, with Giggle thundering after them—raced down to the throne room. By then, they could hear whimpers and short cries. The ghost stiffened and pointed towards the door. _"Something very bad is happening beyond the doors."_

Waddle Doo had quite enough of the ghost being vague. "_What is_."

_"Maybe it would be better if you saw,"_ the ghost mumbled. _"When you enter ghosthood, you have the ability to transmit thoughts to another."_ She tapped Giggle's forehead. Bandana Dee was about to ask _why are you tapping Giggle's forehead he's the horse here_ when Giggle's head snapped up and he nodded.

_"She says I'm supposed to show you what's happening,"_ Giggle said simply.

"He can _talk_?" Bandana Dee was aghast.

_"Of course I can,"_ Giggle replied indignantly. _"Here."_ He breathed out a plume of smoke which gathered in front of them. It rapidly morphed into something familiar—the throne room. Inside, a waddle dee had curled up into a ball and was whimpering. Dedede held his hammer in front of him.

"That's what you get for disobeying the king," Dedede snarled.

"He—He _couldn't have_!" Waddle Doo sounded beyond shocked.

_"He did,"_ the ghost sighed.

"I-I-I apologize, Your Majesty—it really was a mistake." The waddle dee was barely audible now. His voice sounded broken and he was covered in bruises. Bandana Dee felt sick. He had always been braved and marched straight out of the doors from torture, but it seemed this waddle dee did not have the bravery to do so. "I really didn't mean to do it."

Bandana Dee waited no longer. "We are going _in_."

Haddle frowned thoughtfully. "For one, we shouldn't storm in without a plan. For two, _who is that guy_? I think I've seen him before."

Waddle Doo gazed at the waddle dee's figure for a while. Giggle snorted again and this time, the spherical cyclops snapped his fingers. "That's it. Minura. Specializes in whips. I think."

"That's _horrible_." Bandana Dee said the obvious. "Anyway, we'll do this fine. Haddle, you will fly in and get Minura. Waddle Doo and I will get in with a disguise—shoot, we don't have any—"

The ghost held up three black ninja-like outfits. _"I was about to play dress up when this happened,"_ she elaborated. _"It shouldn't be too tight. Oh, and take o__ff that red ribbon of your spear."_

"What. Why—?"

_"The king will immediately recognize it,"_ the ghost said, folding her arms triumphantly. _"Don't worry—I'll hold __onto it for you. I'll make sure no one sees it."_

"...Fine. Do you have a fourth ninja costume?"

_"I have seven. I was thinking if your friends would want to—"_

"Give me one of the extras," Bandana Dee said. Blinking, the ghost handed him a large ninja suit. Bandana De dug around in his bandana before taking out a scissors and began cutting at the ninja costume.

_"Hey—__"_

Bandana Dee plucked out the cut part. It was a long strip of black cloth. He tied it around his spear. "Just temporarily," he said. "We will be known as the Black. If needed, anyway."

After shoving on their costumes—and cutting a big hole for Waddle Doo's eye—they were ready. Apparently, Haddle was _not_ having his wings black and they were storming in like that. Giggle was apparently just staying and watching and storming in when needed.

"Okay, when I open the door, you grab Minura." Bandana Dee nodded at Haddle. "Dedede's torture usually last for _hours_, and Ghostie said it just began."

Bandana Dee used the wooden end of the pole to slightly creak open the door. "—Majesty _I'm really sorry_—" could be heard as he did. Haddle, without any hesitation, flew straight into the throne room, surprising Dedede. Immediately after grabbing Minura, he curved upwards towards the ceiling and began heading out of the throne room. It didn't matter if he was flying upside down. He flew out of the doors and curved downwards gracefully before plopping Minura on the floor. "Here," Haddle said dryly.

Gulping, Bandana Dee knew what to do. Haddle, I need you to bring Minura to the Sick Bay," he said confidently. Adjusting his ninja costume, Haddle grabbed Minura and took off again, speeding down the hallway.

Bandana Dee threw open the door and walked in with the ghost, who was only there to cheer them on. "Listen, Waddle Doo. You get his back and I'll get his front," Bandana Dee hissed as they were walking to confront Dedede.

"Who are you two?"

"The Black," Bandana Dee replied, slightly nervous.

"The Black?"

"Yes, the Black. We save innocent creatures from horrible people." It felt good to say that without getting punishment, Waddle Doo realized. Smiling to himself, the spherical cyclops continued. "You have been treating an innocent creature badly."

"Not my fault! He broke my finest cup!"

_"Lies. The fool has no finest cup,"_ the ghost said dryly. _"It was the red Bonkers who destroyed it, anyway."_

"Yes your fault. You wrongly accused him." Soon as Bandana Dee said that, a bunch of Bonkers stepped into the room. Dedede's hidden guards. Bleh. They were no match for the two of them, and they had back-up. And if Haddle arrived, it was even better. While Haddle was a Healer, he was still good at fighting.

Positioning himself in a fighting stance, Bandana Dee made the _come at me_ gesture.

They charged.

As soon as they did, their back-up came. A jet of silver fire was released and aimed at the Bonkers, clearing a fine path as the ghost heaved two of them out of the way. Giggle threw his head outside. He hadn't been seen.

Bandana Dee was dropped in front of Dedede while Waddle Doo was dropped behind of Dedede. Bandana Dee positioned his spear in a _you are so dead_ position. Dedede yelped. "No! Don't kill me! You can have anything you want!"

"...Anything?" Bandana Dee repeated suspiciously. Dedede nodded. With a grin, Bandana Dee said, "Your hammer."

That way, Dedede had no personal way of abusing anyone anymore.


	28. The Medicine

_OMG! Skipped another two days. What can I say? I'm busy._

_So how much do I owe you? Um...twelve? In any case, it's awful, I suck, and provide me with ideas._

_No answering reviews today. I lazy-lazy._

_Oh, by the way, for these few chapters, the chapters are going to be shorter. They're SUPPOSED to be extremely short, and the chapter 27 was WAY too long. I need to stop writing long chapters._

_Please review. Ideas. Don't you want more chapters?_

* * *

28: The Medicine

_A drug or other preparation used for the treatment or prevention of disease._

* * *

"Oh my god. Minura's awake!" Waddle Doo gasped, eye blinking rapidly.

"Of _course_ he's awake, stupid," Haddle said sarcastically. "In fact—no, his eyes are open and he's speaking and he's sitting upright and drinking water and eating food and going to the toilet **_all when he is unconscious_**!"

"You don't have to be so mean, Haddle," Waddle Doo whined.

"I had to, since you're getting on my nerves," Haddle retorted. "Like, who wouldn't?"

Minura was healing up fine in the Secret Sick Bay. (The Secret Sick Bay, like the Secret Post Office, was located somewhere in the castle and accessed through a hidden brick from Corridor 200.) In fact, he was able to walk around, albeit a weak limp.

Bandana Dee watched as a nurse walked inside, carrying a tray of food. "Here you go. This is for Minura," she said cheerfully. It was Nursie, the waddle dee nurse. "His medicine will arrive shortly."

"_Medicine_?" Waddle Doo squawked. "Oh, that's just sad."

"N-No—I-It doesn't taste that d-disgusting—" Minura spluttered. Minura was a rather shy waddle dee, in any case.

"Really?_ Yellow liquid spells putrid_," Bandana Dee said. "That's one of the things in _Helpful Morals that Rhyme_, anyway."

"You _read_ that book?" Haddle cast a skeptical glance in Bandana Dee's direction. Bandana Dee nodded. "Huh. Of course. You believe a bunch of letters that are completely fake. See? _Winged ones are weaker than buns_. Pfft."

"There's one _sensible_ one," Bandana Dee retorted. "_Use your head or you are dead_."

_"Where's Giggle?"_ the ghost asked curiously, speaking up for the first time they arrived in the Secret Sick Bay.

"In the Dragon Kennel," Bandana Dee replied.

_"Oh."_

"So, Minura," Waddle Doo said eagerly, "what does the medicine taste like?"

"I—Well—I-I'm not sure if you c-could say—"

"Could I have some? It is harmful?"

"Uhm—No, I don't t-think so. I-It's just something healthy to take."

Waddle Doo grinned. "'Kay." He scooped it up and downed it.

Immediately, he ran to the bathroom and spat it all out.

"I—I probably should have told you it tastes extremely bitter," Minura mumbled.


	29. The Question

_Eleven more~_

_Please review and send in those ideas!_

* * *

29: The Question

_A sentence worded or expressed so as to elicit information._

* * *

Something had been bugging Waddle Doo. While Haddle and Bandana Dee were perfectly contented with calling the ghost "Ghostie", he was not so sure himself. He'd rather know her name.

He had been repeatedly telling himself if Haddle could live with calling him just "Waddle Doo" and not knowing his name for a great deal of time, then he could, too.

But Waddle Doo _wanted_ to know. He could not handle it as much as Haddle could, unfortunately. He would not stand for calling the ghost "Ghostie". It was simply _not_ possible for the spherical cyclops. EVER.

So, he walked down to the pendulum clock, where the ghost would usually be when she wasn't with them, and saw her. He tried to start a conversation, that would hopefully somehow lead to her name. He was pretty scared of asking for her name. He wasn't exactly sure why, though. Maybe he was just too much of a chicken. But he didn't care.

"Hi," Waddle Doo began.

_"Hello, Waddle Doo,"_ the ghost said cheerfully.

"Oh, please don't call me that," Waddle Doo said, seizing the opportunity. "Call me by my real name."

_"Oh?"_ the ghost asked curiously, tilting her head. _"Well, what might be your name, if I may know, Waddle Doo?"_

"...Mitchizuka," Waddle Doo replied.

The ghost nodded, smiling cheerfully. She felt like baking pies today. And playing hide-and-seek later, if possible. _"Okay. Hello, Mitchizuka! I was wondering if you wanted to bake pies today. I was thinking of a chocolate strawberry pie. I've also made friends with Chefee and he said we could use the kitchen and its ingredients anytime. And after that, you can call your other two friends and play hide-and-seek. And then I was thinking I could go find Giggle and race with him in the sky. And—oh, how is your friend healing up? That one, Minura?"_

Waddle Doo felt sort of disappointed she hadn't told him her name. "Uh, nice plan. And yeah, he's healing up quite well. He can be discharged in about a week or so."

_"Oh, that's wonderful news, Mitchizuka. I hate seeing your friend hurt. So are we going to bake a chocolate strawberry pie?"_ she asked eagerly.

"Uh...actually, I wanted to ask you something," Waddle Doo said nervously.

_"Of course! Ask away!"_ the ghost said happily.

"Uhm...actually, since my name is Mitchizuka...I was wondering..."

_"Don't worry, Mitchizuka. I'm perfectly fine with you asking anything. Anything at all!"_

"W-Well, a-actually... What... W-What's your n-name?" Waddle Doo asked timidly.

The ghost smiled brightly. _"Oh! My name! That's right, I haven't told any of you! Except Giggle."_

"S-So what is it?" Waddle Doo asked.

_"Jillie,__"_ the ghost replied. _"My name is Jillie."_

And so, Waddle Doo spent half of the day baking a chocolate strawberry pie with Jillie the ghost.


	30. The Race

_Ten more~_

_HADDLE CHAPTER ALERT!_

_Please review, and send in those ideas!_

* * *

30: The Race  


_A competition between runners, horses, vehicles, boats, etc., to see which is the fastest in covering a set course._

* * *

Haddle was becoming increasingly annoyed with R. Bonkers. While he had Giggle the awesome flying shiny silver dragon, R. Bonkers would still brag about his buffalo. It didn't help that Dedede favored that idiot.

So one day, when both Bandana Dee and Waddle Doo were busy, he decided to ride Giggle.

_"Hello, Master Haddle,"_ Giggle said, plodding out of his Dragon Kennel. _"We are flying today, yes?"_

"Yes, we're flying, Giggle," Haddle said flatly. He put the saddle on Giggle. "I heard R. Bonkers' buffalo got wings. I, Haddle, do not want you to lose in speed with that horrendous, fat, shit-colored _thing_," he continued, insulting the buffalo as he hopped on Giggle. "But really, they're truly slow. I'm probably a hundred times faster than R. Bonkers ever will be."

_"I'll agree with that,"_ Giggle said flatly. He pawed the ground. _"Ready for takeoff?"_

"Ready," Haddle agreed.

Giggle began thundering down the field faster and faster, and eventually, spread his huge leathery wings and took off. Haddle clutched the spines that all dragons had from their neck to their tail. Giggle circled the sky, looking down before snorting.

_"The buffalo is here,"_ he commented.

"Oh, augh."

After a long while, the buffalo took to the air, and became airborne. R. Bonkers on him looked at Haddle. "Ha, slow simple cruddy dragon," he snorted.

Haddle's argumentative instincts kicked in. He lifted his head loftily and grabbed firmly onto the Controlling Spines. The Controlling Spines was located at the part where the back and neck met.

"I'm taking that as a challenge, you know, _Retarded Bonkers_," Haddle hissed. "I'm sure your silly, pathetic buffalo is more than a googol times slower than Giggle."

"Don't insult mah Meaty!"

"You called him _Meaty_?"

"Yeah! What about yeh _Giggle_?"

"It's a suitable name, since we'll be laughing at you at the end of this." Haddle waved a hand dismissively. "We shall began our race here, go to the mountain, touch the mountain, then come back and land on the field. Three. Two."

"Huh."

"One."

"Eh, wait—"

Haddle didn't stay to listen and pushed the Controlling Spines forward. Instinctively, Giggle lurched forward and started flying straight again. He turned around to see Meaty struggling to even _stay_ in the air. Haddle snorted.

In no time at all, they were at the mountain. Giggle left a deep, large paw print. Haddle pulled slightly on the right Controlling Spine and Giggle swerved right, and was now facing the other side. Haddle pushed both Controlling Spines forward again, and they were coming back down to the field.

Meaty and R. Bonkers were only halfway to the mountain.

Giggle was above the field now, preparing for landing. Haddle did the thing to command the landing; he pushed the right Controlling Spine downwards first before pushing the left Controlling Spine downwards. Giggle nodded and circled around in the air, above the field, before landing gently.

_"We won,"_ Giggle snorted.

"Easily," Haddle added.

A few minutes later, R. Bonkers and Meaty crashed straight on the ground.

Haddle and Giggle burst out laughing.


	31. The Problem

_Okay guys, I'm really sorry there has been no updates in a while. I keep getting banned, and I have a lot of work to do and all that kinda crap. It's not nice. My life is more busy than I expected so. I'm really, really sorry.  
_

_Chapters from now will be really, really, short. Like, super-short. I'm sorry. But it's what the story is: short._

_ Anyway, so I have a "debt count", which is how many chapters I still have to type, and a "arc" thing, because I have become quite fond of short arcs._

_Debt count(EXCLUDING THIS CHAPTER): 19 (I might be wrong)  
_

_Arc: Haddle's Wings Problem_

_No reply reviews today I'm lazy LOL. Though to the people who sent me ideas, thank you very much, I'll use them straight away._

_Credit to **shadow kirby 56** for this idea._

* * *

31: The Problem

_A thing difficult to achieve or accomplish.  
_

* * *

Haddle knew something was wrong. Haddle knew something was very wrong.

First of all, his lovely white wings had slight brown dots on them. Immediately, Haddle knew something was wrong.

As such, Haddle tried to find out what was wrong.

He couldn't. By the end of the first day, he received no information, his wings were light brown now, and he felt absolutely awful.

Awful as in he had his pride _crushed_.

"Did you roll in the mud?" Waddle Doo asked.

"_No_," Haddle said snappily. "I don't roll in the mud."

"Beneath you?" Bandana Dee mused.

"Yes—Yes, it's beneath me. Very much so. As such, I do not roll in the mud, dirt, or soil, or roll _anywhere_ except my bed. Therefore, something very wrong is going on with my wings. It's not normal. My wings are feeling kind of strained. It is impossible to be just some sort of mud or dirt."

Waddle Doo shrugged. "Whatever. It's probably nothing, anyway."

Haddle held his head high. "No, it _is_ something. And I am going to find out what it is."

What was worse than an angry Haddle was a determined Haddle. Waddle Doo groaned. It was going to be a long day. A very, very long day indeed.

As such, the trio went around from place to place searching on more information.

With Haddle yelling at them constantly for being "slugs".


	32. The Disease

_Okay, so here's another chapter. I just hope I can finish off this debt quickly._

_Debt count(EXCLUDING THIS CHAPTER): 18. But I'm not sure. Can anyone help me find out if it really is 18? Thanks._

_Arc: Haddle's Wings Problem_

___Credit to **shadow kirby 56** for this idea that made this arc.  
_

___Please review! I would like it if you did._

* * *

32: The Disease

_A particular quality, habit, or disposition regarded as adversely affecting a person or group of people._

* * *

The last place they went was the doctor's. Although Haddle was completely convinced his wings were not sick, he decided to go for it anyway. "Perhaps the doctor may know what is wrong with me. So there!" he had said.

Their number was 33, according to that stupid piece of paper. It was now 31 on the small screen above the counter. Jillie had joined them, reason being because she was bored.

As they were waiting, a sudden thought occurred to Haddle.

"Hey, Waddle Doo. If you know how to train Healers, then don't you know anything about them?"

"...Not much. I wasn't told a lot. The person who discovered this art has gone off on a mission and we haven't seen him for a long time. Possibly dead. Anyways, no, I don't know anything about your wings," Waddle Doo said gloomily.

"...Oh," was all Haddle said, before turning his attention to a tissue box.

The number on the small screen turned to 32. Haddle's hope skyrocketed. Hopefully 32 wasn't present at that time and—

R. Bonkers was walking towards the entrance of the doctor's room.

Haddle shrieked loudly, and in an instant, Jillie solidified and pushed over R. Bonkers, out of the whole clinic. The waddle dee that was tending at the counter, Teojiruka, stared at R. Bonkers in wonder before hitting the next number. The number 33 flashed on the screen.

Haddle silently thanked Jillie.

The doctor, Mikolpa, looked at Haddle through his glasses. The doctor waddle dee had bushy eyebrows, Bandana Dee noted. "Well. You must be number 33." He consulted the piece of paper on his desk. "Haddle, is it not?"

"Yes," Haddle replied irritably. "I am a Healer Dee. My wings are usually pure white, but now they are light brown. They do not feel right either. And also, I did not roll around in mud, thank you very much."

"Beneath him," Bandana Dee added. Haddle nodded.

"...Okay," Mikolpa replied. "Allow me to examine your wings for a moment, please."

Haddle turned around (irritably). After a while of searching and prodding—to which Haddle would screech—Mikolpa turned Haddle around manually. "Haddle, it seems that your wings have some sort of disease."

The Healer froze.

"...What?"

"It may not be a disease! But it's something like that. Look, I know an old Healer friend of mine. His name is Juramn. He's a Capsule J but his jets were born weak so he became a Healer. He's quite old, but I'm sure he can help you."

"Where does he stay?"

"Minion Hallways, Corridor 1 Room 1. One of the first ever minions."

"Oh, Uncle Ju," Waddle Doo piped up. "We just call him Uncle Ju, and I forgot his real name after some time."

Mikolpa rolled his eyes. "Well, there you go. Go see Juramn. He'll be able to help for sure."


	33. The Answer

_*sigh* And this is the final chapter of "Haddle's Wings Problem"! We find out what REALLY is the disease, and what it could do to Haddle. Enjoy._

_I couldn't update yesterday 'cause lots of work... PROJECTS UGH. And we had a party. And apparently, using the computer during a party is "antisocial"._

_Debt count(EXCLUDING THIS CHAPTER): 18_

_Arc: Haddle's Wings Problem_

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Meh. I'm horrible at describing chases, let alone why Juramn was out in the first place. So, thank you, but no thank you. Thank you for your idea contribution, but no thank you I will not use it._

_Credit to **shadow kirby 56** who gave me the idea to make this arc!_

_Please review! I mean like...why NOT?_

_NOTE: I do proofread, but mistakes still escape me, so if you can, can you point out any mistakes I might have? Thank you~_

* * *

33: The Answer

_A reply in response to a question, statement, or situation._

* * *

Haddle shot off like a rocket. The other two followed. Jillie threw R. Bonkers back into the clinic and followed them as well.

"This Uncle Juramn, right? Sounds like a piece of cake."

"He's very sick, lately," Bandana Dee said huffily. "He might not be in the state to answer you."

_"Oh, please do stop that, Bandana Dee! You're making it sound as if he is dead,"_ Jillie chided.

"Is it nice being a ghost?" Waddle Doo asked.

_"Absolutely not! There are **many** restrictions in ghosthood."_

"You're really carefree," Waddle Doo retorted.

_"Well! Have you ever seen me enter the throne room? Ever?"_ Jillie demanded. _"No. That is because we ghosts are not allowed near royalty. Castles God accepts, but not the throne room, or anywhere near the king. I leave at least five meters away from the king."_

Bandana Dee paused. "Why can't you be let near royalty?"

Jillie sighed. _"At first, God, Nova, allowed us to be near royalty. But when the rumors started, we were said to be 'cursed', and you know...it would be very bad indeed if the king himself was cursed. Apparently, this 'curse' could be passed on. So the people, being oh-so-paranoid, shunned away us ghosts! They sought out Nova's help. As much as Nova pitied us for being shunned, he loved silly, still-alive creatures more than us. He made a rule in ghosthood no ghost was supposed to be near any type of royalty._

_"And so that happened. We were out of the castle—where many ghosts lived—and in the village. When that king at that time when that restriction was made died, he turned into a ghost. When he could not be near his son because of the restriction, he started crying and weeping. He only just realized how cruel he had been to us ghosts._

_"But we took no pity on him. We mocked and laughed at him. And so he—"_

"We're here!" Haddle yelled.

_"I shall save my story for later, yes?"_ Jillie asked ruefully.

"Yes." Waddle Doo turned the knob to Corridor 1, Room 1. It creaked open and in there sat a lone capsule j, sitting in a corner. "Uncle Ju..?"

Juramn turned around and his single, faded green eye stared at them. "Who be you?" he croaked.

Waddle Doo stared back. "Us."

Juramn smiled. "You pass test."

"...You _are_ a Healer, right?" Haddle questioned.

"Yes."

"You have wings, don't you?"

"Yes."

"You know about my wings, then?"

"Yes," Juramn said, after inspecting the wings.

"Good. There is something wrong with them, yes?"

"Not quite wrong," Juramn replied. "It is becoming weaker, but not for long."

"What?"

Juramn nodded. "It is a point in time where your wings are growing and developing further. However, to do this, your wings must lose their old cells to gain...well, better cells. Because of this, they will get weaker, but only temporarily. After a few days, your wings will be completely white again, even whiter than before, and they will be a lot stronger. Getting yourself off the ground will be chicken feet and you even may not be used to the power."

Haddle was speechless.

"Your wings are simply growing. There is nothing to be afraid of."

Haddle's pride was back.


	34. The Parade

_Okay guys, here's a VERY IMPORTANT NOTE. No, this story is not going to be discontinued, so don't worry. All I want to say is I'm going to stop this whole "debt thing", because, as a reviewer kindly pointed out, I can't actually repay it. And I don't think I can, what with all the exams coming up. But I try._

_So that's that. :/ I am keeping a personal "debt count" though, so if I'm really free, I can just go type a chapter. But it won't be shown since...you guys don't really need to see it._

_Anyways! Welcome to chapter 34! This chapter was originally supposed to be **Destiny Willowleaf's** idea chapter thing but then IT WAS NATIONAL DAY YESTERDAY, so I had to write something similar here. Yeah, kinda late, but who cares? It's called "belated". On top of that, I must congratulate the newspaper for not having a depressing story on the front page. So the next chapter will be dedicated to newspaper._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Sorry for not using your idea I'll use it in the...next next chapter! Anyway, this takes place in the one-and-only-Minion-100-Ways-of-Rdding-of-Boredom- universe. ...Just kidding. But you can call it that if you want to. It's a mixture of the games AND the anime itself. It mostly takes place in "Revenge of the King" in Kirby Super Star Ultra, but a tad of Kirby's Return to Dream Land because Bandana Dee has a spear. The castle, however, has the appearance of the anime. But I suppose it takes place in "Revenge of the King" kind of setting. Except capsule j2s are ugly so I won't include them, even though it's Kirby Super Star Ultra. ...That was one long reply._

_**kirbyfan1996**: Okay. Thanks for telling me. Yeah, I don't think I can repay it. I'm much too busy..._

_HAPPEH BELATED BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE. (longest author's note for me AW CRAP)_

* * *

34: The Parade

_A public procession, esp. one celebrating a special day or event and including marching bands and floats._

* * *

"Psst...Psst...WAKE UP YOU PRICK!"

Waddle Doo shot out of bed faster than a rocket. Unfortunately, due to his speed, he was sent flying straight out of his bunk bed and crashing straight into Bert's bunk bed. Bert was a fellow roommate who is completely irrelevant now.

Anyways, Waddle Doo groaned while Bert gave him a dirty look, as if saying _I tidied up my bed and now you have ruined it!_ but he said nothing. Bandana Dee stood, grinning at Waddle Doo, and after that, his grin dropped into a frown.

"It's _today_, dimwit."

"To...day?" Waddle Doo groaned.

"TODAY. THE TENTH OF AUGUST!"

"Tenth of August?"

"YES!" Bandana Dee yelled, frustrated. He lowered his voice. "Okay, thank you very much. It's Castle Day, the day this castle was founded."

"...Oh _crap_!" Waddle Doo yelped, yanking off his sleeping hat and throwing it onto his bed. He grabbed the tiny flag they were given the day before which sat on his bedside table. It was simply a flag with the sign of the village on it.

Bandana Dee—dragging Waddle Doo with him—ran towards the nearest staircase to the castle above. He knew where the nearest one was, and apparently Haddle did too, because he was waiting, glaring at them.

It had been a week or so after Haddle's wing development and so they were whiter than before and apparently, he shot up faster than a rocket (or anything really fast), Waddle Doo had stated. Haddle's pride was back, and to top it off, a lot larger as well.

"You're late," was his greeting.

"We're not," Bandana Dee snapped back. "In fact, we're an hour early. The parade doesn't start until _five_ in the morning."

"It lasts for ten hours. You _think_ you'll be okay?" Haddle barked.

"They'll give us refreshments, won't they?"

"Yes, they will. I checked the notice board. But it's only a bottle of water and a cheeseburger. There is no time for the chefs to make more, since there will be many guests there!"

"Like who?"

Jillie popped in. _"Like the ghost of the founder of the castle,"_ she said gleefully, circling around in the air.

"You've met him?" Waddle Doo gasped.

_"As a matter of fact...I have. He's not a pleasant chap, is all I'll say... And he's very strange. When you enter ghosthood, you can choose how you look like. Old or young. It also affects your mentality. He chose old, for some strange reason."_

"Hurry _up_!" Haddle yelled, and scooped them all up—excluding Jillie—and flew up the stairs. His wings were naturally stronger, and could carry a lot more load than before.

The parade, as not very planned, started in the next two hours. Most of the minions were pretending to pay attention but weren't actually. Bandana Dee _was_ paying attention, as a matter of fact. Waddle Doo had trouble keeping his eye open. Haddle was making snarky comments at every other special guest.

Haddle nearly shrieked in rage when he saw R. Bonkers labeled "a special guest because he/she is a great minion".

And so, chaos ensued because Haddle shot to the stage, and started attacking R. Bonkers _and knocked him out_. This caused the rest of the minions to attack as well; they had been treated unfairly.

Waddle Doo was among all of them. As in, Waddle _Mitchizuka_ Doo. He was happily firing wave beams at any offenders.

Bandana Dee was staying afloat in the air, just twirling his spear around to keep himself airborne. If he accidentally dropped, he would do jump-floats to recharge his spear.

Jillie accompanied him. She watched for a moment. _"You say Haddle is new?"_

"Yes, he is."

_"He sure does make the castle a lot more fun place to be,"_ Jillie mused as Haddle started slapping R. Bonkers.


	35. The Party

_This chapter was SUPPOSED to be dedicated to newspaper, but I had no idea how to write something like that, so I skipped that._

_Credit to **Destiny Willowleaf** for providing me with the idea!_

_Please review! Because uh well it's good for you to review?_

* * *

35: The Party

_A social gathering of invited guests, typically involving eating, drinking, and entertainment._

* * *

"Uh, um, Jillie?" Waddle Doo asked.

_"Yes?"_ Jillie asked back.

"You...well, did you have any parties before?"

_"Many. Many of them were Death Anniversaries, though... It would be a sad party where everyone would keep quiet, and only talk if necessary. Many ghosts would mourn on that very day. My Death Anniversary is shared with someone else, though, someone who I am not particularly fond of."_

"Who?"

_"Mrs. Bunkar. She's an orange Bonkers but she's terribly annoying. On her—and my—Death Anniversary she would have a completely self-pity party. It would be annoying all the time and most of the time, we would only hold a Death Anniversary for me and not for her, and just allow her to oversleep, which she always does. She never wakes up until the party is over,"_ Jillie replied.

"...Is today any special day?" Waddle Doo asked further.

Jillie blinked. Her Death Anniversary wasn't coming until three months. Haddle only came this year, so it couldn't be his Recruit Anniversary. Haddle's wings also were only developed recently. Waddle Doo's Recruit Anniversary had passed already, and Bandana Dee's Recruit Anniversary was on the very first day of the year, which meant it had passed and was coming in four months. Jillie also joined them just year—after Haddle, even. Giggle was also found this year.

_"Um...no, I don't think?"_

"...Jillie, when were you born?"

_"...The thirteenth of august?"_

"I wonder what's today."

Jillie consulted a nearby clock. _"It's the thirteenth of august, Waddle Doo."_

"Yeah, and there's an event today, isn't there?"

_"Thirteenth of august? ...Oh, it's my birthday!"  
_

"You're slow to catch on," Waddle Doo said dryly. "You can't even remember your own birthday. ...Whatever. Happy birthday, Jillie."

_"What about a party? Is there any party?" _Jillie asked eagerly.

"Yes, there is, at the Dragon Kennel, where Giggle is staying. Bandana Dee and Haddle are preparing for the party and I had to make you _guess_ it was your birthday."

_"I'm sorry about that part,"_ Jillie apologized, floating forward eagerly. She loved parties, and it had been so long since she had celebrated her _birthday_. All the ghosts were grumpy and didn't care. _"Usually no one celebrates my birthday. NO ONE. They're that mean."_

Waddle Doo shrugged. "Wasn't exactly my intention. Bandana Dee made me do it."

_"Bandana Dee is a kind soul!"_

"I shall disagree with you there."

When they took a step inside the Dragon Kennel, there was a burst of streamers and a loud cackle from Bandana Dee (who was disguised). "Happy birthday Jillie!" he yelled, handing her his wrapped up present.

Haddle, less enthusiastic, blew into his party horn. "Happy birthday," he said, a little lamely, passing Jillie a small wrapped up box.

"Again, _happy birthday_!" Waddle Doo shouted, throwing the box containing his present at Jillie. Unfortunately, Jillie was a ghost and had the instinct to turn intangible at that moment. The box crashed against the wall with a _WHAM!_. "Oops. Never mind. It's not fragile."

_"Happy birthday,"_ Giggle said happily. He plucked out one of his silver scales and handed it to the ghost. _"I can't get much, being a dragon. This is the best I can get."_

And after that, they spent the rest of the day in the Dragon Kennel, completely ignoring their duties, and played monopoly.


	36. The Mistake

_...I have really no inspiration for this chapter._

_No review replies because I'm lazy._

_Please review and do...stuff?_

* * *

36: The Mistake

_An action or judgment that is misguided or wrong._

* * *

Haddle was pissed off.

Very pissed off.

Waddle Doo had actually _prodded_ his wings—_prodded_. That was pushing it too far.

The Healer dee was flying down the hallways and trying to find Waddle Doo. It was most angering that he could not find the chicken Waddle Doo. Therefore, he was destroying walls and everything else in his way. He was _getting_ that Waddle Doo.

As he swerved left for the umpteenth time, he met a shadowy corner. He scrutinized the area carefully. Waddle Doo could be hiding anywhere. Then he saw it—the glimpse of reddish-orange.

Shrieking, Haddle threw himself at the offender. He grabbed Waddle Doo's face and sharply slapped it to the side. "You _idiot_! How dare you! How _dare_ you!"

Before Waddle Doo could reply, Haddle delivered another slap to his face. Slapping, kicking, shrieking was the best Haddle could do. No matter how snappish, he was a Healer. But he _was_ a good fighter. He had been trained as one in his past, and nothing changed now.

"_Ow stop it_!" Waddle Doo sounded different. "I'm _not_ Waddle Doo, idiot! I even sound different!"

"You have a _cold_! Of _course_ you'd sound different!" Haddle snapped, kicking Waddle Doo in the face. "I'll make sure you _pay_!"

"I said _I'm not Waddle Doo_!"

"Well, maybe you're not _Waddle Doo_. But you're Mitchizuka so that's that!" Haddle yelled.

"**_I am not Waddle Doo_**!" The figure stepped out of the shadows. Haddle blinked.

"...R. Bonkers?"

"Yeah, me. Wondered when an idiot like you were going to stop." R. Bonkers rolled his eyes.

At that comment, Haddle started attacking again.

Waddle Doo, R. Bonkers, it didn't really make a difference, did it?


	37. The Blimp

_Yipe! Sorry I couldn't do yesterday! But I was really busy. I had to go for a psychiatrist appointment (yes I have mental problems thank you very much), then I had half an hour to prepare and I had to WASH MY HAIR, then I had tuition, then when I came home it was time for dinner, then I had to do homework and the greatest blockage of all. MY SISTER._

_Get it?_

_I probably won't be able to make it on Mondays (my time zone, obviously) because of that schedule. I'll try, though._

_This isn't exactly an arc. I don't think you would consider it an arc, get what I mean? However, this chapter and the next chapter are connected._

_Again, no answering reviews because I'm lazy._

_Please review!_

* * *

37: The Blimp

_A small nonrigid airship._

* * *

"_Welcome to Mini Blimp Services,_" the voice over the intercom said. "_Thank you for riding with us today. The B789 will __be departing in ten minutes._"

Bandana Dee took his seat. The Mini Blimp Services was another secret service in the Minion Hallways. Dedede never enjoyed scenery, so he never looked out of the window, so he never noticed the rather small blimps in the air. He probably thought they were some stupid cargo ships, anyway.

The blimps weren't super small, but compared to a normal blimp, they were pretty small. The mini blimp was packed with passengers. Many were glad to have a break from their castle duties. Bandana Dee couldn't blame them.

Haddle, since he didn't have any castle duties (there was more than enough waddle dees to do the castle duties), was employed at the Mini Blimp Services. This was good, seeing as how Haddle himself could fly and was experienced with being in the air.

The B789 was one of Haddle's own ships. Haddle had insisted they took it. Haddle wasn't the pilot for this trip, though. So he was just another server there.

"Hi Haddle," Waddle Doo greeted. "Is the blimp taking off soon?"

"In ten minutes," Haddle sighed. He consulted the timepiece hanging by his belt that he had just newly become attached to. "In eight minutes and forty-two seconds if you want a precise answer."

"Do you _have_ to wear that belt?" Bandana Dee asked.

"Yeah, its Mini Blimp Services stuff. Timepiece is useful, though, and they have a belt pouch. Can store useful stuff in there," Haddle replied with a yawn.

"How does the blimp take off?" Waddle Doo asked eagerly.

Haddle shrugged. "It's pretty slow. Slower than an airplane. The takeoff is around nine minutes, including the time it has to go round and round the track."

Bandana Dee felt cold. The blimp had a plenty load of air-conditioners. He picked up the provided blankets that was covered in a plastic that read "NO REMOVING FROM BLIMP" on it. He tore the plastic away and shoved it on. "Are these clean?"

"Definitely," Haddle replied. "Washed every time it has been used. We know by the plastic."

"I see," Bandana Dee sniffed, curling up.

Around twenty minutes later, the blimp had suddenly stopped from its moving around the track. Haddle threw a glance at the storage room. "Giggle is in there, right?"

"Yeah," Bandana Dee replied. "The captain allowed us to take Giggle in. Giggle has potty manners, so don't worry about that."

"Well, seeing as how Giggle can fly, I don't think the blimp becoming airborne will be very traumatizing for him," Haddle mused. "Fasten your seat belts."

"Uh..?" Waddle Doo checked his seat belt; buckled.

"'Kay great," Haddle sighed. "Hang on—I gotta go back to the crew cabin. See ya." He turned and raced off.

Three seconds later, Waddle Doo was screaming in terror.

Bandana Dee was shrieking with laughter.

The blimp was airborne.


	38. The Food

_Hai ;) Another chapter to sort of "repay" yesterday's. Actually, I just felt like it, but you don't need to know that._

_Please review!_

* * *

38: The Food

_Any nutritious substance that people or animals eat or drink, or that plants absorb, in order to maintain life and growth._

* * *

Jillie had snuck on the ship sometime, but into storage room—more like cargo room, because that was where all the cargo was kept.

After a while, the intercom buzzed. "_The takeoff was successful. Now we are only just beginning our trip to the forest._"

Waddle Doo sighed loudly. Jillie passed through a wall and patted his head. _"I just checked on Giggle. He said it was...exhilarating. He loves blimps now. Probably airplanes even more, but he hasn't been on one yet."_

"Where's Haddle?" Bandana Dee asked.

_"In the crew cabin. I could fetch him if you want."_

"Yes, please, thank you very much."

With that, Jillie disappeared through the wall again. Waddle Doo yawned. "I'm kinda hungry. It's been two hours since we've boarded the blimp and I haven't eaten anything since. _Ugh_. I wish the other passengers weren't so late!" He gave the other passengers dirty looks, to which they responded with flummoxed glances.

Seeing this, Bandana Dee hurriedly corrected his spherical cyclops friend. "No! We were _early_. You wanted to come early, remember?" Bandana Dee said, prodding an area near Waddle Doo's eye. He squawked and slapped his hand away.

"Whatever. I'm hungry. Is lunch being served yet?"

"Didn't you notice I called Haddle just now? Will you just wait?" Bandana Dee knew Waddle Doo loved to eat, but sometimes he was far too annoying for his own preferences.

Jillie soon came floating back with another servant. _"Ah, here they are,"_ Jillie said cheerfully. _"Haddle was busy, so he sent another crew member."_

"And you called me _because_?" the crew member demanded.

"Waddle Doo 'ere wants food," Bandana Dee replied.

"What. Lunch is being served in _an hour_! It's only eleven-thirty, mister." The crew member shook his head.

It was one of the rare times Waddle Doo decided to be menacing. He straightened himself, his eye glowing. He activated his Beam ability, and it glowed a sharp, brilliant light.

The crew member looked indeed intimidated, but pretended to stand strong.

As demonstration, Bandana Dee took out a pad of small square papers and tore one out, dangling it in front of Waddle Doo. He fired out a beam laser, causing the paper to burn up to ashes and sprinkle all over the floor.

"Food?" Bandana Dee asked cheerfully, deliberately, waving his hand with the remaining ashes.

The crew member gulped. "I—I suppose I could get you some biscuits, for the time being, but that is the most I can do..."

"Good," Waddle Doo nodded in approval. "By the way, send someone to clear the ashes up."

Jillie smiled. _"And to think just a blimp takeoff would scare you, Waddle Doo."_


	39. The Entry 1

_Ack! I really need to stop playing that new Mario RPG. Like seriously. You know, when I started this story, at first I thought I CAN TOTALLY UPDATE EVERY DAY YOU IDIOT then now I'm STRUGGLING to update every day. Suck._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: As in, 'cause a blimp takes off really un-scarily, then Waddle Doo was scared but he could intimidate someone. Which is not happening every day._

_**guest**: As much as that is an amazing idea, unfortunately, Mr. Mitchizuka has no mouth at all. ;)_

_Okay, so, this is a diary entry from our one and only Bandana Dee. I'm gonna be putting entries like these all over, so they're gonna be called "The Entry 1" and the definition will be put as "the first entry" so on and so forth. Get me? I'm just doing this diary entry thing occasionally, so yeah._

_Please review!_

* * *

39: The Entry 1

_The first entry of Bandana Dee's diary._

* * *

Bandana Dee's living headquarters had actually been upgraded, courtesy of someone. (Bandana Dee couldn't remember that someone's name. Mr. Technology? In any case, the "man" looked more like a woman to him.) There were now bookshelves, the bunk beds were upgraded (the sheets were prettier and more comfy and THERE WERE BOLSTERS. Holy hell, if Bandana Dee loved anything, it would be hugging bolsters. And his spear) and their boring old floor was now a CARPETED FLOOR (like the ones in fancy hotels).

And of course, many more other upgrades.

Bandana Dee decided he liked this Mr. (Mrs.? Miss? He/She didn't look quite married) Technology.

Bandana Dee searched under his pillow for something that should _still_ be there. He felt the smooth, leather cover and sighed in relief. Thank whatever god Bandana Dee believed in. His diary was _still_ there.

His diary was quite old, given when he was born. He never used it, because his life was always packed, but on a rarely boring day when Haddle was yelling at someone and Waddle Doo was appointed head chef because Chefee sprained his wrist...diary-writing was a good idea.

Bandana Dee snatched the ballpoint pen that Mr. Technology had gotten for the minions. In fact, each minion received a small _box_ of ballpoint pens. He flipped open his diary and tapped the empty page thoughtfully.

And no, Bandana Dee was not the "dear diary" type. That's just disgusting. How dare you even think of that.

_To the completely unused diary,_

Ah, yes, that sounded good. Bandana Dee _felt_ it was good. He paused at the next line.

_Life is boring._

That sounded good, too.

_I rarely have any free days. The stupid king (King Dedede) is always giving me work to do. And I just realized when I AM free, there is absolutely nothing else to do._

Bandana Dee swatted the fly that landed on his diary. Stupid insect couldn't keep to itself.

_And so...life is boring on these days. You know, if Waddle Doo or Haddle were free, we would do stupid things. Don't judge me. Friends do stupid things together._

The fly came back. Bandana Dee successfully killed it with a strike of his fearsome spear.

_It's the first time in how many years that I've actually bothered writing. No, I've never bothered writing before. I mean, I thought it was silly until Waddle Doo pointed out that it was just like recording your days. I still thought it was silly, anyway. So now that I'm doing this silly thing I guess it makes me silly too. Speaking of silly, the king is silly, and I want to punch his face. I WOULD have if that wasn't against the law. And anyway, if I want to punch his face, who knows what Haddle wants to do to him?_

_...I don't wanna know._

_Jillie actually likes Giggle a lot. I think it's 'cause they can both fly. Actually, Haddle can fly too, so I don't think it's that. I think it's because Giggle is the only one Jillie can talk to when we're busy. THAT makes me feel kind of bad. But really. Jillie has—to be VERY VERY HONEST—nothing else to do. She bugs us when we're doing work. I remember the time that crate would have squashed her if she hadn't turned invisible._

_Huh._

_It's already late at night and Haddle and Waddle Doo are still busy. I wonder who Haddle's yelling at, actually._

"GO TO SLEEP YOU SLEEP-DEPRIVED LUMPS!" yelled the patrolling waddle dee who was in charge of making sure they slept. He thundered inside. "WHO AIN'T INSIDE YET? HUH?"

"Mitchizuka and Haddle," one of the braver souls in the room said.

"WHAT THE HELL! WHAT ARE THOSE IDIOTS DOING? HUH?"

"We don't know," they said simultaneously. Stupid patrolling waddle dee was just _so_ stupid.

"I BETTER RELIEVE THEM OF THEIR DUTY!" And with that, the patrolling waddle dee—Mr. Takara—turned off the lights and exited the room with a resounding _BANG!_.

Bandana Dee grabbed his flashlight under his bed (he kept many things under his bed) and turned it on, and placed it on a water bottle holder on the wall, so the light shone on his diary as he finished it.

_And so, Mr. Takara just came in and yelled at us. He said he's going to "relieve" Mitchi and Haddle of their duties. (Mitchi is my nickname for him.) Anyway, I kinda hafta sleep now, so goodnight._

_-Bandana Dee_


	40. The Burger

_No, I am probably never ever going to repay that 23 chapters that I owe. (or was it 24? Uh...) So suck it up._

_**coleypepwars3679**: Actually, where HAVE you_ _been? _

* * *

40: The Burger

_A particular variation of a hamburger with additional or substitute ingredients_

* * *

If there was one thing Waddle Doo was most horrible at, it was making decisions.

Most of the time, he had the sense to make the better decision. But when it was a minor decision and there was no "right" and "wrong", he was absolutely horrible terrible horrendous treacherous stupid idiotic _god-awful_ indecisive.

And, as Haddle liked to call it, fickle.

So they were in the chicken, Waddle Doo was making a burger, Haddle was sitting on a stool and eating parrot food (parrot?) and Bandana Dee was eating some random chocolate biscuits he snagged. When Waddle Doo screamed (unpredictably. Why would you scream when you're making a _burger_?).

"IT'S _HORRIBLE_!" he yelled.

"What is?" Bandana Dee asked.

"Cheese or chicken!" Waddle Doo continued.

"Uhm..?"

"You see, it's between a cheeseburger or a chicken burger! I like chicken burgers better, but I've had them every day! So I would take a cheeseburger, but I prefer chicken burgers! HELP ME!"

"Then why don't you take a chicken burger?" Bandana Dee asked, confused.

"Get the freaking cheeseburger. You'll die of the same thing," Haddle remarked dryly.

Waddle Doo fell on the ground sobbing. His friends were not helping.

"WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DOOOOOOO?"

"That was a horrible pun."

"It wasn't a pun!"

Haddle flicked a crumb away from his left wing. "If you're so troubled, then just put a chicken slice in replacement of the stupid patty!" he said hotly, nearly flinging (and scattering) his parrot (?) food all over the floor, but he instantly swooped it up.

Waddle Doo gasped. "You're a genius!"

"I'm _not_," Haddle spat, shoving a mouthful of parrot food in his mouth. "I'm average. _You're_ just stupid."


	41. The Ball

_Two chapters in a day—aren't I nice now?_

_BTW:_

**_VERY IMPORTANT NOTE THAT ALL OF YOU MUST READ OR ELSE DIE: I am absolutely NOT updating every day. As most of you can see, it is completely inconsistent and I have days when I can't even ACCESS the stupid laptop. While it is not updated every day, it will be updated very, very, very often, so don't worry. :3 (EW I JUST MADE THAT FACE.)_**

* * *

41: The Ball  


_A solid or hollow sphere or ovoid, esp. one that is kicked, thrown, or hit in a game._

* * *

What happens when you throw something at Haddle without his consent?

The answer is simple.

And we're about to find out.

So, it had been a very natural, boring, stupid, god-awful (a word that I have recently picked up), day, just like any other, with Dedede making his very "important" speech which was highly unimportant because it was mainly about eradication of all things that went against him and universal domination.

Haddle, like every other minion in the castle (which is an unknown number only known by... Nova), was sitting on a log bench, trying not to fall asleep while listening to Dedede's 4.5 hour "important" speech (which was SO unimportant) and he was always late, so usually 5 hours.

And what made his temper worse was that, across the aisle, freaking R. Bonkers was sitting there. Haddle felt like punching him.

So, on the right, it was R. Bonkers. On the left, was Waddle Mitchizuka Doo who had already fallen asleep. Well, it didn't help that this stupid "important" (NOT) speech was every _week_ and somehow the _stupid_ penguin could actually think of something new.

Haddle felt extremely bored and went to doze off to Lala Land for a while.

Something hit him at the back of his head and landed promptly on his lap.

It was a gigantic freaking soccer ball.

Haddle could not be bothered with a stupid soccer ball that he could not kick in this cramped castle yard so he instead threw it to his right to (hopefully) irritate whoever was sitting there and happened to be bonked by it.

"YOWCH! YOU GOT A PROBLEM, NOOB?" R. Bonkers yelled, holding the soccer ball in the air. The crowd burst out laughing, but Haddle simply stared, drowsy mind taking all of this in, and he suddenly narrowed his eyes, straightened his wings and back, making himself seem taller, doing the super-arrogant-Haddle pose.

Haddle pounced, clawing at R. Bonkers as he attempted to rip out R. Bonkers' eyes (wait, he _had_ eyes?). "Did you just call me a _noob_?!"


	42. The Clinic

_HAI!_

_I was thinking this over and I realized while Haddle is a Healer... HE HAS DONE NO HEALING BEFORE._

_So, he will now._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: I don't like a lot of candy. :/ Only chocolate and lollipops._

* * *

42: The Clinic

_A place or hospital department where outpatients are given medical treatment or advice._

* * *

"What. The. _Heck_ Haddle you never seemed like the type to do this!"

"Obviously _not_. And then suddenly one day when I was making purple puke I remembered that I was trained to be a Fighting Healer," Haddle said sarcastically. "Which, was, by the way, not at _all_ purple puke, but eggplant mash."

Bandana Dee stood in front of Haddle's new clinic (the only public clinic in the castle), _Healer Haddle's_. He would not believe the violet winged waddle dee would do _this_, but it did make sense, since he was a Healer.

"I am _dreaming_!" Waddle Doo yelled.

"If you are, then I would gladly punch your face to wake you up," Haddle said gleefully. "Oh, and, because my staff is... uhm, _not the best_ so you two are employed!"

Waddle Doo was pulling on a strand of hair on his hand (trying to see where to cut it because he claimed it was "longer"). "What. I _am_ dreaming! There is no way you would ever do that."

Haddle snorted. "Well now I am and it was set up yesterday and it was on the job bulletin board so now everyone wants to apply at the first interview is in an hour and you _will_ help me by taking down notes!"

"Well that would be fun," Bandana Dee mused.

About half an hour later, Bandana Dee was armed with a notepad and Waddle Doo was sitting on a rolling chair (or what Bandana Dee liked to call "spinny rolly chair") and Haddle was seated at his desk. Behind him was a bunch of shelves—full of medical stuff, Bandana Dee assumed.

"Why so early?" Waddle Doo asked.

"Psh, they're _always_ early... And even if they aren't... it's better to be here earlier anyways."

"How much staff do you have?" Bandana Dee asked.

"Including you?"

"Yeah..."

"...Four."

A while later, the first applicant walked in. Bandana Dee immediately saw something different about him. He was a waddle doo, but not just some stupid waddle doo (like Mitchizuka). He was green with peach-colored feet, and he had an iridescent, scaly tail. His tail was curved upwards so it was hanging above his head. A very accurate description would be it looked like a scorpion's tail. At the end of the tail was an arrowhead, most likely for attacking.

"Aye," the green waddle doo said, saluting.

"Okaaay..." Haddle shifted his notes around (he was just stalling, but the green waddle doo didn't need to know that). "My name is Haddle, the... _boss_ around here and here are my two main assistants, Bandana Dee and... Mitchizuka. What would be your name?"

"Midori," the green waddle doo said respectfully.

"What sort of healing abilities do you have, if any?"

"My tail's scales. They can... uh, heal."

"And the tail itself is used for attacking and defending, yes?" A solid nod as a reply. Haddle nodded. "Okay..." Bandana Dee was busy scrawling down all the notes so Haddle spoke very, very, very, _very_, slowly for him to catch up. "Do you have any defects? Mental problems?"

Midori tapped his chin. "Sort of... Although I have only one eye, I can see three different field of visions. Somehow."

Haddle seemed relatively interested now. "Oh. Is it... called... uh... Vironals?" A nod. "Oh, one of the rarely useful defects. You will certainly prove useful." Haddle nodded to the door. "Please tell the receptionist to call for the next person."

Bandana Dee sighed as he turned over the next page of the notepad. His hand was going to _hurt_ at the end of the day.


	43. The Cat

_Two chapters because I am nice._

**_WARNING: shortness of shortness and not for someone who likes cats._**

_REVIEW OR ELSE... I don't know, get Haddle to murder you?_

* * *

43: The Cat

_A small domesticated carnivorous mammal, with soft fur, a short snout, and retractile claws._

* * *

Eventually Midori was employed to be a main assistant.

But that is not the point.

Haddle himself did not hate cats, nor disliked them, but simply thought of them as... cats. They were so-so for him, so that was absolutely not the reason why his eye twitched when the next patient came in (his clinic was very crowded since it was the only public castle clinic) holding a bloodied cat.

It was because it was _R. Bonkers_.

"A-hem," Haddle said his favorite businesslike tone he had recently adopted. "Well, er, take a seat." He tore a large piece of tissue paper and another from the roll of large tissue paper at his desk and put them on the table, and R. Bonkers put the bloodied cat on it. "Well, what would it be?"

"Obviously, the cat is—"

"Please do not be rude or else I will have my assistants kick you out."

"Fine! The cat is injured, I want to use him as a helper in battle because he has potential. But he's injured and I can't heal—don't heal!—so I came to this clinic which is the only clinic around."

Haddle eyed the cat disgustedly. "First, we wash it. It will not die because of water, R. Bonkers, so don't make that stupid expression."

Carefully, Haddle slipped on some gloves, lifted the tissue paper with the bloodied cat on it and walked over to the sink on the other side of the room. He set it down. "Midori, get me a towel from the towel rack there—yes, thank you very much." Haddle set the towel beside the basin. He turned on the water carefully, Midori watching as he slowly moved the cat towards the rushing water.

Once coming into contact with the water, the cat yowled and was screeching and clawing at Haddle in no time. Haddle grunted, making sure all the blood was washed off before setting it on the towel, where it was writhing in pain less. He carried it back to his table using the towel.

Removing his gloves, Haddle turned on a lamp that was connected to his computer and bent it over to shine on the cat. After checking his computer for a while, he nodded. "Ah, the cat is not dead yet. There is still a way to help him, that is, if you are willing for me to help."

Now that all the blood was washed off, Bandana Dee saw it was a white cat, and with its eyes blinking rapidly, he could just make out it had silver eyes. He squinted at it. Cats could have silver eyes?

"Of course!" R. Bonkers yelled.

"Well..."

Haddle turned around to his shelves and started digging through them. He pulled out a rather big orange jar from one of the shelves and set it on the table. It had a little spoon holder (which held a wooden spoon) to dig whatever was inside out.

"Pass me a bowl, Waddle Doo."

The bowl was obediently handed over and Haddle undid the lid of the orange jar. He scooped up a spoonful of purple puree and continued spooning it into the bowl into it was half full. After that, he washed the spoon and put the orange jar back. He took a small glass bottle from another shelf filled with blue liquid and undid the lid.

The room was immediately filled with an oddly sweet scent.

Bandana Dee couldn't help but feel suspicious—usually sweet things were unhealthy.

Haddle poured a tiny drop onto the purple puree, then put the glass bottle back.

"Here. The purple puree is a special kind of puree that will help the cat to heal. This blue liquid will let it be eaten without any problems whatsoever."

R. Bonkers snatched the bowl and let the silver-eyed white cat slurp it up, and it was satisfied. R. Bonkers began cradling it in his arms (which Bandana Dee had to slap himself to prevent himself from bursting out into laughter).

"Well, I hate to say it, but—"

"Be rude and I'll kill the cat."

"Fine. Thank you very much, _doctor_."

"Oh yes, it's not going to heal right away. I'd give it a week," Haddle called as R. Bonkers walked out. "And don't forget to pay!"

Bandana Dee was quiet even after the door closed. Midori piped up. "So is the cat gonna 100% heal?"

Haddle grunted. "It was cursed."

"_ARE YOU SERIOUS_?" Waddle Doo screamed.

"Yeah. No lie."

"So what did you do to it?" Bandana Dee asked curiously.

"I fed it poison," Haddle said simply, "and it is going to die."


	44. The Python

_You know how I said there would be a sequel? No, I'm not cancelling that, __I'm just going to do a sequel of a sequel. For more information you could check my profile..._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: It seems that you would prefer having a cursed cat killing everyone in the castle to having a cursed cat being killed first so it can't harm anyone?_

_Also, some tiny information:_

_**HOW I GOT THIS CHAPTER IDEA**: I was looking through some very disturbing pictures of pythons._

* * *

44: The Python

_A large heavy-bodied nonvenomous snake._

* * *

Waddle (Mitchizuka) Doo had been officially _scarred for life_.

He had been walking in a less busy place of the castle when he _bumped _into something. It was green and ugly and _huge_. It was around 40 centimeters high and mind you, Waddle Doo was as big as Kirby which meant Waddle Doo was only 20 centimeters high. The great ugly green thing was double his height.

Second thing, it was _scaly_. Waddle Doo jumped over it (with some difficulty) and then realized what he had bumped into.

He had bumped into the Castle Python.

The great green ugly beast was a freaking mile long. It destroyed walls (unless it happened to be snaking down a hallway) to move around. It was called the Castle Python because it was found, one day, in the throne room. It was _not_ a demon beast, but it was a huge, ugly, great green python.

So, Waddle Doo was officially scarred for life.

At _Healer Haddle's_, Waddle Doo told them his story. Midori seemed to know a huge chunk of information.

And also, Midori apparently was there ten years earlier before Bandana Dee was recruited.

"The Castle Python," Midori said, "was found in the throne room three years after I was recruited. It was too huge to go around strangling people, of course, since it's about 40 centimeters high, but it might have grown from when I last saw it.

"The Castle Python used to lurk in the prison cell we trapped it in. But one day, the stupid king went and freed it. When he did, the Castle Python was free again and it's been going around the castle as it pleases ever since.

"And the Castle Python only goes around at the west wing of the castle, and this clinic is on the east wing, so we will be safe," Midori said, finishing his completely short tale. "I've encountered it ten times."

"...Shouldn't we kill it? It's slow, and we'll be able to kill it with this many men we have," Bandana Dee said.

"We would, but... the king doesn't exactly want to..." Midori sighed. "But the great ugly green beast recently killed one of the stronger men, I heard."

"Oh, _ugh_!"

"A Fire Lion."

"Double ugh!"

"Dedede has a pet python," Haddle said suddenly.

"Yeah?" Waddle Doo raised his only brow.

"Yeah. It, um... something... looks huge. And it's green. But it's a baby, I heard, an egg found in the west wing one day. I think it might be the Castle Python's egg."

Midori squinted. "It's a _female_? Ew."

Haddle shrugged. "I don't know. Considering it's a Magikle—"

"What the heck?"

"Magikle. The Castle Python's species. A very large, slow and bloated, carnivorous python. Considering it's a Magikle, we don't know whether the female reproduces or the male. Or both."

"It's species sounds like _magical_," Bandana Dee said.

Midori swung his tail around, shrugging. "I suppose _that_ kind of large thing would be 'magical'."


	45. The Preparation

_Seriously speaking..._

_Life is horrible._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: I am going to assume that is from Warriors. Assumptions are wonderful._

* * *

45: The Preparation

_The action of making ready or being made ready for use._

* * *

"What the hell—well, _excuse_ me!"

"I thought you didn't swear," Bandana Dee said blankly.

Haddle scoffed. "Right. As if. Everyone swears. Don't give me that bullshit and say you haven't. You _have_. Admit it."

The fat ugly king himself was now perched on Haddle's client seat. Haddle was amazed himself, then started yelling about the king breaking the chair. Offense was taken, but Haddle was able to defend himself.

"All righty," Dedede said, folding his arms. "Let's get down to business. For one... I think you have heard about the Promotion."

"The time of the year when minions do great acts to hopefully promote themselves by pleasing the king with their skills? Yes. I have heard about it. It is a week away, in fact," Haddle replied, paying attention to the clock on the wall instead of Dedede's unsightly face.

"They must not be sick and must have very simple meals every day," Dedede continued. "And because of that, I thought you would be the _perfect_ person to talk to. Just excellent. So the ones taking part in the Promotion will be being taken care of by your clinic."

"That is such an... dishonor."

"_What_?"

"A clinic is for healing people. Not a feeding people and letting them stay here. There is a _great_ difference there, sir." Haddle continued looking at the clock. "But I would take care of them if absolutely necessary. Their meals will also me absolutely meager. It will be a small bowl of millet gruel every day. Take it or leave it."

Dedede scoffed. "You think I care about what you feed to them?"

"Yes. If I don't feed them, they'll be dead by the end of the week. Which means they'll never get through the Promotion."

"Fine! As long as you feed them. There are 107 taking part in the Promotion and are all waiting outside of the clinic. You are to check their health before sending them to their private rooms which are very close to your clinic."

"Their health will be checked tomorrow," Bandana Dee said, folding his arms, not liking the way Dedede said such things. "We are very busy today. And we expect eleven operations today as well. There will be no time."

As soon as the 107 minions entered the clinic, Midori took over and began his speech. "Listen up. I know you're all excited for the Promotion but you _must_ know that you are staying in some private rooms beside the clinic. You will be fed a bowl of millet gruel and a cup of water for meals every day. If you would like to go out of your room, you must inform one of the staff at the clinic and first receive permission, or else you will no longer be in the Promotion. If you would like to quit the Promotion, please do inform one of the staff here. If any questions, you could ask the staff, again."

As Midori stepped off of the crate that was used as a platform, Haddle made a face. "You think half of them would get promoted? You've been here longer than any of us."

Midori shrugged. "My guess is only a fifth would get promoted. And a fifth is a lot, over the previous years."


	46. The Energy

_Just in case you need to know, the Promotion IS NOT about fighting in an arena, but instead performing arts to the king (which will be judged by Your Stupidity later). Because fighting is lame and I suck at action._

_And, no, none of our protagonists are in the Promotion. They are, 100%, NOT in the Promotion, but they will be watching it._

* * *

46: The Energy  


_The strength and vitality required for sustained physical or mental activity._

* * *

After Haddle had so pleasingly starved the applicants for the Promotion with millet gruel, Midori decided to "teach them something that would be very useful in life that not many people know about". Apparently, Haddle was raised in... a temple of sorts, before joining the castle.

So, Bandana Dee sat cross-legged, waddle dee style, focusing hard on Midori's words. Which were hard to understand. Sometimes.

"Spiritual energy," Midori began, "is going to help you in many ways, but since this is lesson number one, I am going to teach you how to see spiritual energy in your mind-sight."

"How are we going to do that?" Waddle Doo asked.

"Shut up. I was going to tell you. Now, if you've practiced at it quite a lot... it will be easy to see spiritual energy, even in bustling places. But for beginners, a quiet place—like this clinic—would be best." He smiled wryly. "Now, you are going to have to memorize the steps. Because once you begin, everything must be silent."

"Okay," Bandana Dee replied.

"It's quite simple, really. Just relax yourself and let yourself drift off into any other random universe you might have stored in your head. Once you are relaxed enough, you must find a way to dig deeper into your spiritual energy. The method is unique. Everyone has a different way of digging deeper into their spiritual energy. For me, I have to lower my tail so it hangs in front of my eye. But as for you, I can't say for sure," Midori said. "Once you've done that, you will see strings. They will be a bit hazy and not-so-string like, but more of like flowing energy. But still... flowing energy strings, you could call them. There will be many colors, each representing one person."

"How do we know which color is who?" Haddle asked.

"It's simple," Midori replied. "How can you tell Waddle Doo here is Mitchizuka and not some other random waddle doo?"

Bandana Dee shrugged. "Because Mitchi is Mitchi and we can always tell."

Midori sent Bandana Dee a thumbs-up. "Exactly! You _will_ be able to tell. The more deeper you are with your spiritual energy, the clearer the string will be, making it easier for you to find the person. If you can make your mind-self latch onto the string, you will be able to find that person."

Waddle Doo narrowed his eye suspiciously. Sounded hard. "Is that all?"

The green waddle doo pondered over this for a moment, before nodding. "That would be all for today's lesson. Now begin."

Bandana Dee was quite a kick-backish person, so he easily relaxed, perched on his comfortable chair. Midori didn't say you had to close your eyes, so he didn't. He concentrated hard, until he was relaxed enough (or he _hoped_ he was relaxed enough) and tried to think of a way to dig deeper into his spiritual energy. He could see Haddle folding his wings against him on his back. Was that possibly his way?

Inwardly shrugging, Bandana Dee decided to just follow his instinct. He saw Waddle Doo pulling on his hair a little, and Bandana Dee figured it out soon enough—it was to do with something that they were proud of.

And what was Bandana Dee proud of?

Simple.

His bandana.

He made a wild grab for it and pulled it down. And suddenly, in his mind-sight, he was in a place full of darkness.

Weren't there supposed to be strings?

Digging deeper in mentally (without having to pull down his bandana), Bandana Dee could now see some faint strings. One was a fiery red that looked like Haddle's; another was a slightly luminous turquoise that looked like Midori's; another was a bright yellow that looked highly like Waddle Doo's. Bandana Dee checked his own string. It was a cerulean, apparently. He also saw a silver, which was Giggle's (dragons have spiritual energy?) and a pure white string that was glowing more brightly than the others.

Was that Jillie's?

Before Bandana Dee could decide, he felt a slap on his right cheek. Not an angry fight slap, but a wake-up kind of slap. Midori's iridescent tail was dangling there before he withdrew it to his normal position.

Midori cleared his throat. "Okay. That was good. But I need to bring one one last thing."

"Yes?" they echoed simultaneously, then glared at each other.

"Ghosts, like Jillie," Midori added once he saw Waddle Doo's confused expression, "also have spiritual energy. However, it is stronger than living ones'. Reason is simply because they _are_ spirits. It's basically their normal energy and their spiritual energy combined. So, usually ghost spiritual energies are brighter and clearer than others."

"Okay," Waddle Doo replied.

"What about Giggle?" Haddle asked.

"Dragons, likewise, also have spiritual energy. But it's not as strong as living ones' because they're more of dragon energy."

"Ooh."

"Which I will teach you _later_ _because I need to take a piss_!"

With that, Midori sprinted off to the bathroom.


	47. The Skill

_So I haven't been here for a few days. And what do I care?  
_

_By the way; one of my longer (or longest) chapters so far. I had a lot to say. So. :/_

_And bah. Did you actually think I'm going to describe what skills they perform? If you did, I'm going to have to say that that is exactly OPPOSITE of my intention._

* * *

47: The Skill

_A particular ability._

* * *

A week had literally flown past with Bandana Dee practicing his spiritual energy, Haddle being sadistic and feeding them small portions of millet gruel, Waddle Doo claiming that one strand of hair was longer than the other and whined about it all the time, and Midori being very, very vain.

"The Promotion is _tomorrow_," Haddle exclaimed, digging through his shelves and pulling out a sheet of paper. "Some people dropped out of the Promotion. But not many. We still have 100 left."

"Why'd they drop out?" Bandana Dee asked.

"I'm not sure. I think they thought it was too hard. What with the feeding of meager millet gruel." Haddle checked the document up and down, as if examining every bit of it. "It will be held in the arena, the place where Dedede always fights Kirby. It starts early in the morning, at six."

"That sucks," Midori whined. "It's only four, Haddle, and you woke us up two hours early. I could prepare in fifteen minutes."

Haddle waved him off. "We, being the important staff, must be there early."

So at around five, they reached the arena. Most of the applicants were up and about, wandering around. Haddle gathered them around and had them all sit down.

"Before you start, you will be down in the basement," he said. "You are not to come out until it is your turn. You may watch the group that is performing their skills to the king. If you need to drink water or go to the toilet, you must be very quick. Be reminded that you will not be waited for, and if you are late, then you have no chance."

Gulps could be heard. Bandana Dee felt rather... impressed. He never thought the Promotion would be so serious. Well, he could have asked Midori, who had gone through the Promotion around two times—and both times got promoted. He never listened how the Promotion worked—he didn't bother to go through it. So long as he impressed the king, he would be promoted by the king himself automatically. It was very simple.

And so, at about six, the king made his way to his grand gold seat which was where he would be seated. By the looks of it, the king was examining the arena to check if none of the participants were not in the basement. Or he was just looking at the crowd that was madly cheering for the participants to come up. It was a rule for every single minion to watch the Promotion in the arena. Which was also called the Great Arena. Since there was no one to defend, the canons were set to Auto-Defend.

A waddle dee sidled up to Midori, then handed the green waddle doo a note before shooting off. After scanning through the note's contents, a loud cry of:

"**_THAT IDIOT_**!"

—could be heard throughout the castle. Probably extended even more. Midori was seething in a corner, and it took all of Bandana Dee's courage—and perhaps even more—to timidly walk up and ask the most dangerous question that anyone could ask Midori in this kind of mood.

"...What did it say?"

Luckily, he got a rather not-so-offensive response.

"That _idiot_—the great, fat, _stupid_ king—wants me to be the MC. And that sucks."

"I know."

"Then _great_. Where's that stupid script?"

Haddle blinked, turned around, searched through the dusty shelves of the basement, and handed it to Midori (in his most regal manner). "It's starting about now, so I suggest you head up there."

Bandana Dee watched the television from the basement. He, like Waddle Doo and Haddle, had to make sure everything was fine in the basement. The "let the first group perform" caught his attention, though, and Midori promptly jumped into the basement.

"Hurry up. First group," he called, acknowledging the first group. "No more delay. You _have_ to go up. Now."

Most of them were now shivering as they stood up and walked up from the basement to the arena. Bandana Dee watched them go as he swiftly looked back at the screen. A shriek of applause went around the crowd and was silenced by Haddle's piercing "Shh!".

Bandana Dee watched the screen with less interest, when he realized all they were going to do was just a bundle of smart moves. He turned around and noted that R. Bonkers was in the sixth group. There were now ten groups in all.

A little anxiously, Bandana Dee grabbed a cookie from the cookie jar Midori brought down. He nervously bit into it, and ever so cautiously, finished it off. This was certainly very... tense. Very.

"First group's done."

Before Bandana Dee even knew it, Midori was dragging himself up to the arena again and was bringing down the first group.

The second, third, fourth and fifth were equally nervous, and Bandana Dee could tell, from the expression of the idiotic king, that_ most_ of them _would_ _not_ make it. Oh well. Those senseless creatures had to go ruin themselves.

The sixth group was up, and Bandana Dee paid more attention. He was going to laugh at R. Bonkers. He _was_. He knew he was going to.

Surprisingly, as Midori led the group on the arena, R. Bonkers suddenly yelled.

"_Hey_! You hear me, ya idiot king?! Well, you'd be an _idiot_ to test_ me_ because I'm so _great_ ya don't even needa! Might as well just promote me _now_!"

"You have to go through the Promotion normally like all the other participants," Midori told him firmly. "You are no exception. If you had any sense, you'd be staying down right now, R. Bonkers."

Bandana Dee yawned and stood up, fumbling for his spear which was fastened safely on his back. "Welp, I'd better get going upstairs."

"Why?" Waddle Doo asked.

"I don't know."

"Well, that's stupid."

"Indeed. The world _is_ very stupid, isn't it?"


	48. The Breakage

_Annnnnnnd TechnoDee's back after her super-long-holiday. Actually, it wasn't a holiday. It was full of bullcrap and missing the internet for about four to six days because the stupid internet was being annoying, TechnoDee's phone is getting irritating (so she's been talking to it. Like calling it stupid) and why is TechnoDee speaking in third person? IT IS HER CHALLENGE OF THE DAY._

_(No, she doesn't have challenges of the day, she's just being stupid, but you don't need to know that.)  
_

_**Lokaio**: OH. YOU. TECHNODEE REMEMBERS YOU. She was just about wondering where you were. Huuuuummmm...  
TechnoDee never explained the smart moves because she fails at details and would rather not halve your IQ by them.  
Oh. Okay. TechnoDee will correct the error. Thank you for pointing it out!  
He works at both. Mainly at the clinic, but at the Mini Blimp when the clinic is closed (which is on Sundays, when the others get lazy).  
Yeah. TechnoDee gets kind of lazy these days *pokes ground* so TechnoDee goes on a vacation, which she actually doesn't because there's a lot of homework, so now TechnoDee's updating is like once in a RED MOON. ...Actually, the moon's red when there's a lunar eclipse... so maybe a green moon?_

_Please review! Even though TechnoDee has been lazy. ;^;_

_(PSST! BREAKAGE OF FOURTH WALL!)_

_LAMENESS BEYOND THIS POINT. NO FLAMES. OR ELSE. ALSO, NO FUNNY COMMENTS._

* * *

48: The Breakage

_The action of breaking something._

* * *

"Cheese sticks—" Haddle began.

"GYFEBONWUDGBOHMYGOD!"

"—taste nice," Haddle finished.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"

"What's wrong?"

"WAITWAIT! DON'T MOVE!"

Haddle watched as Midori violently slammed his tail on the ground, completely squishing and effectively killing whatever he was trying to kill. After a couple of slams, Midori removed his tail to cautiously to peer at the broken thing.

A cockroach.

Midori.

Used.

His.

Freaking poisonous tail.

To kill.

A.

_COCKROACH_.

"You just _destroyed_ my clinic floor!" Haddle roared, in his fierce demonic sounding voice that would penetrate your mind and basically burst your brain.

And, Midori was immune to it. "And _newsflash_ I'm _not_ paying for it!"

"You are _horrible_. First, you start screaming when I tell Bandana Dee I like cheese sticks—"

"Waddle Doo was screaming, doofus!"

"—then you scream again, destroy my clinic floor, and tell me to pay for it. Are you stupid, or are you stupid?"

"I think you're the stupid one. Because, I realize stupid only has one meaning."

"Ugh! You know what?! This chapter is _stupid_. Why are we even doing this?!" Haddle lamented, slumping down his chair.

Midori shrugged, cleaning his tail at the sink to get rid of the icky stuff (cockroach blood). "Because She Who Is Higher Than Nova said so?" he suggested, inspecting his tail carefully, wiping off every single bit of the icky stuff.

Waddle Doo groaned. "Why does she even need to know about our lives?"

"Because people are uninterested in it," Bandana Dee said, as if carefully picking his words. "Therefore, she planned this story so people _would_ be interested in our lives. I'm not sure why. Is she trying to get us popular?"

"Was she bribed?" Waddle Doo guessed.

"With candy?" Bandana Dee added.

And then a huge boulder sailed through the window (effectively crashing it and the wall) and landed on the floor with a _CRACK_. Written on it in what looked like blood (they shivered) was:

"DO NOT BREAK THE FOURTH WALL OR FACE THE SERIOUS CONSEQUENCES AND IT'S NOT BECAUSE I WANT THEM TO BE INTERESTED IN YOUR PUNY, MUNDANE LIVES! IT'S BECAUSE I'M _BORED_, YOU STUPID, STUPID _TOADS_!

-TechnoDee

(P.S Written in block 'cause blocks are awesome.)

(P.S.S This is _not_ blood! How dare you accuse me of that! This is chili sauce! It's thicker!)"

"We were caught," Waddle Doo said dreadfully.

"That's because you and Haddle were screaming!" Bandana Dee yelled, pointing at Midori furiously.

"So? It was brought up by Haddle, not me."

Haddle stared in horror where the boulder sat.

"_My floor_!"


	49. The Bucket

_WELL. HELLO. NICE TO SEE YOU. (No, that doesn't make sense, because I can't see through the computer screen, as much as I would like to.)_

_Don't complain about my updating speed. My exams are coming soon. They end around mid-October. And like, first test is next week. The one good thing is that I passed my Science Practical. If I failed, my mom would be all, "How COULD you fail your Science Practical? There are only PRACTICAL things inside!" Well, no shit, Sherlock._

_**Nashew**: Hi! Nice to see new reviewers! They are nice people and should be appreciated. :D  
1. Oh. That. Well, she's the same species as Princess Rona from the anime. I kinda forgot to mention that at those chapters...  
2. Yes.  
_

_PLEASE REVIEW BECAUSE REVIEWING IS NICE AND REVIEWING MAKES ME BE EPIC AND HYPER FOR THE DAY!_

_(PSST, WHO NOTICED I'VE BEEN IGNORING JILLIE AND GIGGLE?)_

* * *

49: The Bucket  


_A roughly cylindrical open container, typically made of metal or plastic, with a handle, used to hold and carry liquids or other material._

* * *

_"Well."_

Jillie stared in dismay as the sheep danced across the yard in a very sheep-like manner. She was supposed to cross it, but with that sheep dancing all over the grass...

_Crunch._

_"Well."_

Giggle devoured the sheep in one bite.

_"Well?"_ Giggle turned towards Jillie expectantly. Slightly startled, the ghost became tangible and quickly picked up the bucket. She crossed the lawn and placed the bucket there. She watched in horror as the silver dragon spat the bones far, far away.

_"It was an innocent sheep!"_

_"I was innocently hungry."_

Sighing, Jillie floated back to carry the buckets over. This was the place behind _Healer Haddle's_, the place where all the medical things were kept. It was just a small yard, and Jillie, to tell the truth, had no idea how the sheep got there. Sheep were not permitted in the castle.

The door from _Healer Haddle's_ creaked open. Jillie saw a scarlet Bonkers step on the grass, rather anxiously. She noticed a rather large wound a his knee cap. Giggle rolled his eyes backwards, then glanced at Jillie.

_"That's the guy they dislike. Rad Bonkers."_

_"Oh. Well,"_ Jillie said for the twelfth time that day. _"Hello, R. Bonkers. How's your day? I mean, how's that knee cap?"_

"I was sparring," R. Bonkers replied. "And I got injured. Stupid Haddle told me to come here—"

A book was promptly thrown at his head. "I am _not_ stupid!" Haddle's voice hollered from inside.

"—and get the 'Magical Wonder of Dragon Thing'. He said you'd know."

_"OH!"_ Giggle couldn't help but snicker.

_"Shh, Giggle,"_ Jillie instructed, heading over to the buckets. She tore a piece of bandage and took a ladle and dipped it inside one of the buckets. Inside the bucket was some kind of translucent-looking goo. She spread it over one side of the bandage, called R. Bonkers over, and placed it over his wound.

"Oh, it feels super relieving. What is it?"

_"It has medical properties,"_ Jillie said, trying to avoid the question.

"Oh, okay, but what is it?"

_"You'll need to keep it on for twenty-four hours, and the wound will get better. If it doesn't, please come back."_

"What _is_ it?!"

Giggle burst out laughing.

Jillie sighed.

_"Dragon saliva."_


	50. The Star

_Well... I guess I might as well just update..._

_I have a test tomorrow. I am going to fail. D: I suck at oral. Wish me luck._

_(WE'RE HALFWAY THROUGH! We should have been a long time ago.)_

_**Nashew**: You can submit it either way, I don't really mind._

_**coleypepwars3679**: That was five words, bracketed words count._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Because we like bullying him. And if not, we like... being mean. Which is the same thing so whatever._

_Please review!_

* * *

50: The Star

_A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun._

* * *

"HEY! HEY! LET'S STARGAZE!"

"No, I'm lazy."

"No, I'm fixing my bandana."

"No, I'm trying to kill Haddle's floor."

Waddle Doo rolled his single eye at his unenthusiastic friends. "Right. As if. Midori, why are you trying to kill Haddle's floor? Bandana Dee, your bandana is _already_ fixed. Haddle, you've had a day full of patients and paperwork and I think you should do some stargazing."

Midori made no effort to reply.

Bandana Dee began playing with his bandana.

"That's exactly _why_ I am being lazy. From this chair to outside where Giggle and Jillie are takes too much effort and I don't feel like walking," Haddle said curtly, folding his arms.

Waddle Doo narrowed his eye. "I could push you outside."

Haddle shook his head. "No thank you, as I would prefer—I SAID NO THANK YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"

Waddle Doo yanked Haddle's chair and began steering him outside. With a _THUMP!_ Midori brutally murdered Haddle's floor and scuttled after the two of them. Bandana Dee decided he did not want to be alone and trotted after them placidly.

"The stars are so _pretty_!" Waddle Doo exclaimed.

"Let _go_ of my chair _now_," Haddle seethed, rocking himself out of Waddle Doo's grasp.

"Hm." Midori looked at the grass and wondered if its durability was greater or stronger than Haddle's floor.

"It's a shooting star," Bandana Dee said abruptly.

"_Really_?!" Waddle Doo screeched. "Hurry UP! MAKE A WISH!"

"That's a child's legend," Haddle said flatly.

"I don't care!"

The shooting star was gone.

"What did you wish for?" Bandana Dee asked thoughtfully.

"That I could melt Haddle's floor with my acid," Midori said shortly. If you hadn't noticed, he had taken to destroying things, and perhaps melting them with his poison, for some strange reason or another.

"You're a horrible person," Haddle sniffed. "I wished you'd let go of my chair."

"I wished I could get a brighter blue bandana," Bandana Dee declared. "This one is getting dark and dull."

"What about you?" Haddle demanded, glaring at Waddle Doo.

"If I told you, it wouldn't come true!" Waddle Doo defended childishly.

"Okay, I know for one _that_ was not in the children's legend," Bandana Dee said flatly.


	51. The Monster

_Gosh, I want to slap myself to death for not updating. But meh. My tests are super-soon... Which is like, the day after tomorrow. That's stupid! Who has exams on Children's' Day?! (I do.)_

_**coleypepwars3679**: Actually, no, I'm not a big fan of cakes. And before you ask, I don't eat birthday cakes._

_**Nashew**: "Killing Haddle's floor" means to destroy it. You know how to destroy a floor? Like, make cracks in it? Midori likes killing Haddle's floor because... he just does._

_Please review!_

* * *

51: The Monster  


_An imaginary creature that is typically large, ugly, and frightening._

* * *

"What's going on?"

Bandana Dee blinked at the crowd before him. Someone called him. He squinted carefully, turned around, then climbed onto some ivy that was latching onto the wall. Ivy was a common thing in the castle. It was old and you would expect plants to grow in it.

The large room was cramped with minions. Bandana Dee did not particularly like cramped places. In fact, he used to have claustrophobia until he got over it. But he still did not like cramped places. It basically rendered you immobile, maybe even squished you, and no one cared for each other and wanted to go up to the front to have the "best view". Bandana Dee liked watching from afar better. But it wouldn't be called watching if he couldn't see it at all.

"Bandana Dee!"

Someone called him again. Bandana Dee heaved himself up the ivy and swung his head towards the scene. It was a pile of rubbish. Bandana Dee squinted again until he spotted a familiar green waddle doo with a scorpion-like iridescent tail.

"Midori!"

Bandana Dee let go of the ivy. However stupid, it proved to be... _sort of_ useful. He landed flat on the ground, and the minions who had been standing there instinctively jumped back so there was a one meter distance between them (this was a trained thing in the army, to stay away at least one meter when something dropped).

"Yeah?" Midori blinked at Bandana Dee curiously. "What?" How he had gotten there so fast was beyond Bandana Dee.

"...What's happening?"

"Oh, that? It's the Grim. It's a monster. It's like... a gigantic monstrous octopus. It hasn't been fed in more than fifty years. It's got a really dark aura, and they pile rubbish on it so the Grim can't... attempt to break free."

Bandana Dee sighed, before sauntering through the crowd. More people looked at him cautiously. Bandana Dee spotted the king, went up and saluted. "Greetings, Great King. I will assume it is you who summoned me."

Dedede didn't even acknowledge his presence. "All right then, ya see this rubbish? I hafta feed the Grim. Get all the rubbish off."

Midori thoughtfully stretched out a shovel that had been lying against the wall, probably to dig out all the rubbish off. Bandana Dee grabbed it and placed it on the rubbish. And then he noticed it was not quite rubbish, but dead creatures. He squinted for the third time and dug in and threw it backwards. Minions yelped, scattering all over the room to avoid the flying corpses. After a while of digging, the trapdoor was revealed. There was a horrible stench in the air, even worse than before.

"There!" Dedede exclaimed. "I'm going to open the trapdoor!"

"Great King, there is—"

Dedede set his hand on the trapdoor, pushing Bandana Dee away.

. . .

He let out an ear-splitting shriek.

"WHY IS THERE A SNAKE THERE?!"

"It's a mummified black snake, Sir," Midori said helpfully. "I have done research on every bit of the castle, and this mummified black snake must be removed before the trapdoor is opened. It is kind of like a lock. Please pass me that shovel?"

Bandana Dee timidly handed over the shovel, which stunk by now. Corpses did not have the freshest air. Midori boldly flung the mummified black snake to join the rest of the corpses before nodding. "That should be all, Sir."

Dedede cautiously opened the trapdoor, dropped some kind of meat inside, and closed it again.

"All right-y! Now, minions, please help to put back all the corpses on the trapdoor," Dedede said, relieved that it was over.

"But the king must do it," Midori stated. "It is tradition for the king to place back the corpses. A minion may remove them, but the king must put it back with his bare hand, otherwise the Grim will not be satisfied." In a much lower voice, he added, "Or that's what the book said."

"Why did I even have to feed this stupid monster?!"

"If it was that hungry, it would rampage, break out of its prison and eat _you_," Midori told him. "Even if you try to offer it food."

Bandana Dee wondered how long Dedede would continue to be the king after this.


	52. The Kiosk

_I am so, so sorry I haven't been updating. I have exams, though, so I suppose that could be used as an excuse._

_And to think this fic was supposed to have short chapters, like only 100 (or less) words. And now I've written them too long. You people deserve a short chapter. It's what you originally deserved anyway._

* * *

52: The Kiosk

_A small open-fronted hut or cubicle from which newspapers, refreshments, tickets, etc., are sold._

* * *

Midori had opened up a small kiosk outside _Healer Haddle's_, called _Waddle Reads_. It sold newspapers and magazines, and stuff like that.

It was instantly popular. After all, newspaper was only sold in the village and the minions were only let out of the castle once in a freakin' brown moon. You would see more people in the castle sitting down and reading newspapers—a _lot_ more. Magazines were also popular.

For some reason or another, Waddle Doo was handed the duty of adding extras to the newspaper, such as things that were going on in the castle. Jillie was supposed to float around the castle like the ghost she was and find out about all the rumors, and all that kind of stuff. Haddle had somehow managed to get Waddle Doo to add something about his clinic inside.

"What are you doing?" Bandana Dee inquired as he skipped by _Waddle Reads_. Midori was mixing something in a pot.

"Trying to make edible ink, neon green for starters—why, hello, dear customer, how may I help you?" Midori asked as he set his pot down.

"Today's newspapers," the waddle dee replied.

Midori turned around, grabbed the newspaper off the stack behind him, and handed it over. "5 Dede Coins," he said.

The waddle dee handed over 5 Dede Coins (the castle's currency, because Dedede is a self-centered jerk). He scurried away.

"R. Bonkers has never ever appeared in front of my kiosk, by the way," Midori stated dully. "Think you know why, perhaps?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Bandana Dee sighed. "He can't read."


	53. The Pizza

_Yak! Tomorrow's last exam and I'll die.  
_

_And I hate my sister. She ate MY lunch. Butt ugly good-for-nothing sister. And now she uses the desk that belongs to me even though we very well know that she has her own, just that's it's super cluttered because she doesn't bother to arrange it. I feel like murdering her and plucking out her innards and feeding them to the pigs. If pigs eat human innards, that is._

_Also, please not that I will not respond to every review but only those which I feel that I want to reply. If I've got nothing to say I won't reply to it._

_**Nashew**: ...It wasn't supposed to be funny! *gasp of terror* I did not just write something funny in the last chapter. No, I did not._

_**waddlesword7star**: This isn't going anywhere. This is the kind of story that has no plot and is purely for entertainment. A no-brainer, some people call it._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: What do you mean by that? I don't understand. And yes, I know who Escargon and Silica are. And I call them by that because I watch the subbed version of the anime, not the dubbed._

* * *

53: The Pizza

_A dish of Italian origin consisting of a flat base of dough baked with a topping of tomato sauce and cheese, typically with added meat._

* * *

Most minions at Castle Dedede had eaten this glorious Italian dish named "pizza". Likewise, Bandana Dee had, once, as well. He had eaten one without meat and just with cheese (because he was a self-proclaimed vegetarian, in which mind the "self-proclaimed" because he is not actually one, just he does not like eating meat a lot) and it had tasted rather nice.

So, they were sitting in the yard behind _Healer Haddle's_ where Jillie collected buckets of dragon drool, remember? Midori had already closed down _Waddle Reads_ for the night, since it was late. Bandana Dee thought it would be nice sharing his experience about pizza as they roasted marshmallows.

"My mom took me to this Italian restaurant called _Wadia_ during one of the breaks that Dedede hardly gives us," Bandana Dee told them as he struggled to remember his experience. "She said there was a new item in the menu called pizza. So because I was curious, I tried it out. It tasted nice. It didn't have any meat because I'm a vegetarian—"

"Self-proclaimed," Waddle Doo added helpfully.

"—and I refuse to eat any meat. Yes, Mitchi, self-proclaimed," Bandana Dee said, giving Waddle Doo a half-glare, the other half focused on roasting the marshmallow. "What about you guys?"

"Once, _with_ meat, and pineapples," Haddle replied as he chewed on the marshmallow.

"A few times," Midori replied.

"I haven't tried pizza," Waddle Doo answered.

They all stared at him. Uncomfortably, Waddle Doo turned to the ghost. "What about you?"

_"From the land I came in, there were hardly any Italian dishes..."_ Jillie mused. _"Though, I do believe I've eaten this pizza before. In fact, I fed it to Giggle the other day. He puked on it. Dragons don't eat pizzas, I suppose."_

"You have no life," Bandana Dee said, poking Waddle Doo with the roasted marshmallow on the stick before eating it.

Midori let out a shriek. Bandana Dee turned and saw a burning marshmallow on the stick, in his hands.

"_The marshmallow caught fire_!"


	54. The Umbrella

_Well, no more exams. Yay. At least more updates._

_**Destiny Willowleaf**: Unfortunately, I'm going to have to say no to it. Sorry. :( Main reason because I want to add as least as possible anime stuff to this story. And Giggle—he doesn't like scaring people as a prank. And he doesn't like carrying people who he does not know much about. And he's not the prank type. He's competitive, but he's not the prank type. But judging by that, I could possibly turn it into a oneshot. If you want to, that is. I could do a oneshot because then I can just kick Giggle's personality but I'd rather not do that in this proper story._

_Please review! Ideas are still being welcomed (even if I haven't mentioned it, I've been lazy, and I sound like a parrot)!_

* * *

54: The Umbrella

_A device consisting of a circular canopy of cloth on a folding metal frame supported by a central rod, used as protection against rain._

* * *

"The king's going out for a while," Midori informed his friends.

"Huh?" Bandana Dee tilted his head. "Why?"

"He's gonna buy candy," Midori replied. He turned on a device called the Weather Tracker, basically a portable gadget which showed weather forecasts all over the planet. "It's going to rain soon. A thunderstorm."

"He shouldn't go out," Haddle remarked, not looking up from the medicine.

Bandana Dee, on the other hand, was more supportive of the king. Instinctively, he shot to his feet, bolted out of the room, dashed all the way to the throne room and flung open the door. "Your Majesty!" he yelped. He saw the king getting ready to leave.

Dedede noticed Bandana Dee, puffing at the doorway of the throne room. "Bandana Dee? What have you come to tell me? That the candy shop is _closed_?" he demanded.

"No, Your Majesty—but we're going to have a thunderstorm too. The weather forecast said so!" Now that Bandana Dee looked out of the window, the sky was really dark. "You mustn't go out!"

"It's only a half an hour trip," Dedede said, rolling his eyes. "I'll be using my car, as you know."

His car was open air. That only fueled Bandana Dee's worry. "But, Your Majesty!"

Dedede grumbled, not wanting to argue with a pesky minion (or what he would call pesky). "Fine! I'll take an umbrella." He grabbed the nearest umbrella, then stormed out of the throne room. Bandana Dee was less worried—but only by a fraction. He continued to yell to the king, about how it was dangerous, and Dedede even tried going through the Minion Hallways to shake Bandana Dee off. They passed by _Waddle Reads_, where Midori was sitting and looking at them, and Dedede managed to get Bandana Dee off his tail by telling the minion he would make a cover for the car in plastic. Bandana Dee, satisfied, wandered back to _Waddle Reads_.

"Should you let him alone?" Midori wondered.

"What do you mean?" Bandana Dee asked, snatching the latest copy of the newspaper. Midori helped him take his wallet and take out the Dede coins before passing them back.

"He was carrying an umbrella with a metal tip." Midori pulled Bandana Dee into the kiosk and turned him around to face a window that faced the front of the castle. Midori shoved a pair of binoculars onto Bandana Dee, and Bandana Dee could see the car driving off. It was pouring now; and Dedede didn't have that plastic cover he promised. "Metal is a conductor of electricity."

"What!" Bandana Dee was horrified. "He'll get electrocuted!"

"Exactly," Midori said, folding his arms.

It was utmost terrifying to Bandana Dee when lightning struck the king.


End file.
